Went ahead and fed "Marissa" into the search engine for the folder of docs from the college computer, and I am uncovering a gold mine of Notepad thoughts from season 3. Things I don't have the faintest memory of thinking. Personal Fandom Archaeology is amazing and a large part of why I will keep this blog until LJ implodes. There's a whole episode review from one of the Sadie-inclusive episodes (I totally forgot there was a character named Matt on this show!), for instance. Also a fandom survey in which my answer for "the character I would shag anytime" is Seth, which is...not the answer I would have guessed.
* Also found this truly accurate description of the show in answer to the self-posed question of whether I am going to watch season 3:
" I will probably give it a third chance, at least until the rutting season begins (usually occurs a month or two after the legal-troubles season)."
* And this bit that I literally thought was canon somewhere but is actually just my real vivid headcanon
"Can I kiss you?" Johnny asked. Marissa turned her head sharply, her look swift and admonishing. "Not a real kiss," he added quickly. "Just on the cheek. You know...thank you."
(also wow, the rest of that fic draft is just...awful. so self-indulgent and melodramatic and I need to publicly shame myself for trying to make Marissa say that whatever she and Ryan once had is over / they're better off as friends. YOU ARE GARBAGE, PAST ME. Thank goodness you had the sense not to post it)
* Not that I don't already have 6 books in my to-read queue, but if you think I am not dying to reread Take Me There as Ryan/Marissa, you are wrong. I don't know why I would want to do that to myself when it works so beautifully as teenage Miles/Rachel, a pair it is surprisingly hard to match to books, but I can't stop thinking about it. (it's just really hard to find quality bad-boy-with-a-heart-of-gold books in general. I don't want to put myself through any more suffering without a guarantee it won't be the trash I assume, often correctly, that books with such a character are. Goodreads, if you recommend Perfect Chemistry to me one more time I am gonna rate it 1 star out of spite. I don't have to hate-read it to know I would HATE IT)
* ...in related news time for my new favorite hobby: writing summaries of novels I pretend could exist in a world where instead of TV shows existing, their characters are the characters in these novels. It's actually a pretty great outlet because it allows me to prod my brain for ideas of what I'd like to see, without the pressure of actually writing an entire fanfic (or any fic content, for that matter) while utilizing one of the few types of writing strength I have left: the kind I flex on Goodreads.