I really, really need an Office icon. I swear I'll get one just as soon as I can convince myself to dump the Lost icon I haven't used in months.
Stupid show and its stupid screwey scheduling!
Grey's Anatomy: Kung-Fu Fighting
Yeah, I'm pretty sure that rantviews are officially going to be the standard for this show now.
1. Um, I'm watching this on abc.com, and the little preview picture shows George and Izzie in bed together. Fully clothed, thankfully, but are they going to stay that way? Because that would be cute, but naked in bed together would not be. So, to recap: snuggling good! Sexing bad. Please don't force me rip my eyeballs out in horror.
2. Heee, this is why I love Cristina. "Have you considered...maybe you and Derek should STOP having break-up sex?" Sadly, I do not think Meredith has. She has trouble making logical connections where sex is involved. See also: Random Indian Dude, picking up.
3. Whee, the trailer! Remember when Addison lived there? I wasn't paying attention those days because I hated her at the time, but I retroactively miss them.
4. Oh my God, even though this probably falls under the "Dumbledore" category of slash, I think a couple of Derek/Richard shippers were just born. Ew. Now I REALLY miss the days when Addison lived in the trailer.
5. Hah! Look, they're even bickering over breakfast! The writers of this scene are clearly closet slash fans.
6. But because I am not one, I will totally not make any inappropriate comments about what they could do to "take their minds off" women.
7. Not even when Richard himself suggests a "gentlemen's evening." *desperately stifles giggles*
8. What's George doing in the on-call room? Is he sleeping? That's a wholly inappropriate use for that room; what if somebody wants to have sex? You're so inconsiderate.
9. Oh, I like what Izzie's proposing. Giving George a place to sleep would be a perfectly logical explanation for that preview picture and
OH MY HOLY LORD! *spills drink on self in panic* GROSS. Izzie needs to not say that. Not like that. Not to George. Ever. Again. As far as I'm concerned, they exist in a perfectly pure and sexless relationship. Yep. Pure. And sexless! Don't forget sexless. It means "without sex."
10. Izzie: "Tonight, we will have hot--" And that's where I ripped my earphones out in abject horror and just waited for the scene to be over.
11. Oh look. It's Hahn. You know how I eventually came around on Addison? There will not be a repeat performance of that with her, I promise you. Certainly not as long as they keep twisting the knife in the Burke-shaped hole in my chest.
12. Parachute Man...hey, it's Roy! So this is how you're dealing with getting fired from Dunder-Mifflin, huh? Excellent.
13. Okay, the wedding dress ladies clearly need to spend some time in the Psych ward. It's barely started and I'm already sick of this storyline. Mostly because I'm too tired to go off on a rant about what a ridiculous waste of money weddings are.
14. Callie and Mark are wearing identical predatory smirks as they look at George. My two least favorite characters are conspiring to torture the poor little lamb? *hates*
15. Aww, Ivory Billed Woodpeckers are pretty. I thoroughly sympathize with this awesome patient and want him to leave. Live! I meant live! He's going to die now, isn't he.
16. I love Cristina's "I am married to cardio" metaphor. It's awesome because it's true. Shut up, Izzie. How many people are going to have to learn that in an X vs. Xtina smackdown, the only X who might come out on top is Bailey? Sheesh.
17. How the hell is Roy not injured? Did he fall 12,000 feet and land on a giant marshmallow?
18. Stop staging Alex/Lexie conversations. Do not corrupt my innocent baby Lexie! I'm convinced that if she spends even an hour around the guy she'll turn into a jerk. His corruption power is that strong.
19. And here I thought my hatred for Mark and Callie was maxed out. My mistake.
20. The residents' glee over the skydiving video is hilarious.
21. Oh, NOW we choose to have Meredith come to self-realization after her drowning? The hell? Shouldn't this have happened quite some time ago?
22. Yang is awesome. I knew she'd find a fantastic way around the anesthesia allergy. Knew it!
23. Allow me to turn on the hate faucet for Hahn. You'd better have a damn good reason for continuing to snub Cristina from surgeries. (a/n: Nope, not that's addressed in this ep anyway)
24. See! Right there, corruption was visible in the fact that Lexie used subtle sarcasm to trick her patient into having surgery. Boo.
25. ...okay, I redact a tiny bit of my Hahn hatred, because her asking Mark & Derek if they were a couple was THE BEST MOMENT EVER. Or at least, the best one since Mark thought he was an earless boy's daddy. Basically, anything that embarrasses Mark makes me happy.
26. George apologizing for fear that an innocent remark sounds dirty = happy me. As does the idea of Izzie being mistaken for George's wife. Because, see? From an objective outsider's point of view, an outsider who gets to view them fully clothed at all times, they ARE all cute and carrying that adorable newlywed vibe.
27. Good GOD. *turns Hahn hate up full blast* The woman is HYPER AWARE of the slightest hint of sexual discrimination. I want to punch her in the face more than ever.
28. Gross, these two again. How many naked-beneath-sheets scenes have Mer/Der HAD in the course of the show? Do their brains not function while in an upright position, or something?
29. I apologize, I was writing snark while listening in pure audio. Soon as looked at the video again, I was mesmerized into silence by the Extreme Caring in McDreamy's eyes. It's so beautiful and painful it hurts.
30. *squees* Nuzzling! NUZZLING! I was hoping and hoping and there it was! *explodes from squee* I die happy now.
31. Her daughter's wedding is her mother's dream? She's putting herself into debt to achieve HAND-GRAVED INVITATIONS which I'm almost positive people eventually throw away anyone? That is the stupidest damn dream I've ever heard of. Even though I was kind of gunning for this girl to win because she had pretty hair and that quiet, shy air about her, suddenly I think she deserves to lose for not talking her mother out of such idiocy.
32. Birdwatching Guy is weird. If I were him, I'd have my eyes squeezed shut, pretending to be unconscious. I would certainly not be observing my surroundings while people sliced open my chest.
33. Hey! As much as I've mocked the women for their wedding dress battle, I think she's perfectly justified to care more about an expensive prize than about a woman she doesn't know. Standing next to someone for two days doesn't endear you to them. Duh. And surgery for a dislocated shoulder isn't all the horrible, so there's no reason it should be the first thing on her mind when she's thinking about an important contest.
33. Oh, Callie, just SHUT UP. Your patients don't have a clue about your personal life, stop throwing it at them.
34. Awww, poor Derek. "She won't let me take care of her." Ladies, raise your hands if the biggest complaint you've ever had about a relationship is that your boyfriend cares about you too much. If I may paraphrase Burke's Shakespearian Sonnet and blast it in Meredith's ear, he is a good man. A kind and decent man. Who loves you and wants to marry you and have kids with you and take care of you. What the hell is the MATTER with you that you won't just LET HIM?!
35. Awww, even though I still hate Izzie for usurping the surgery with her human-empathizing ways, I kind of love the way she's calming down Birdwatching Guy by having him identify what kind of birds the people in the observation deck would be.
36. But...Great Blue Heron for the Chief? No question? I question it! I would have gone with Great Horned Owl. Definitely some kind of owl.
37. Shut up, Callie. Do you want praise for letting go, or something? I've been screaming it at you for like a year, just shut up and do it already.
38. Aww, okay, Brunette Woman and her fiancee are sort of adorable after all. I'm glad they won. The blonde didn't deserve to win for being so vain and shallow. It's even worse than stupidity. Especially when you're the less attractive of the two women in the first place.
39. *punches Hahn in the face* I hardly think that inviting two male attendings who happen to be your friends (well, kinda) to some event qualifies as discriminating against women. Are you telling me there are only three attendings in that entire hospital? Yeah. Come on. Erica Hahn is an idiot.
40. NO! LEXIE! Oh my God, damn it Lexie! Bad girl! No developing a crush on the bad boy! Seattle Grace has pheromones in its air circulation system that make it impossible to keep emotional attractions from eventually becoming physical! GRRRRRR.
41. Okay, now Erica is officially trying to be Burke at the hospital and Addison outside of it. She's failing spectacularly on both counts. *hates*
42. OH! But they're playing Monopoly! Oh, that's too awesome. I knew the Chief's idea of fun would involve board games.
43. Eeeeuuuwwww, George and Izzie and candles and ATMOSPHERE OF AWKWARD. I'm actually torn over which is worse, drunken one night stand WHICH NEVER ACTUALLY EXISTED, or Atmosphere of Awkward.
44. *brightens* Izzie's starting to cry! I would consider this a step in the right direction if George wasn't clearly having horrible, horrible Meredith flashbacks. *hugs George*
45. Holy good mother of...why is she still rambling? Can George not see that he should be shushing her with a finger to the lips, smiling, and telling her it's okay if she's too tired, because he is too and so they can just literally sleep together? Come on, George! Be dreamy for once!
46. Or you could just do your awkward thing, and look like you're beginning to doubt whether you really want to jump into another (potentially) long-term relationship. Yeah. That's great.
47. Way to ruin the fully-clothed spooning scene. *sulks* (although finally George, geeze, took you long enough to come up with the soothing "shh.")
48. OH MY GOD, SEATTLE GRACE, how badly did you mess with your pheromone system over the summer? Now crushes can't even last two episodes before they lead to sex? *HATES ALEX/LEXIE**HATES* HATES IN... GIANT FONT SIZE OF RAGE!! >:(
49. This space is reserved for raging and obscenity-spitting.
50. That seriously blindsided me. I thought, half a dozen episodes at least, and if we were lucky some random person barging into the on-call room would interrupt them...and now, oh God I have to scrub my eyes like whoa and despise Lexie with every fiber of my being. Why, Shonda? Why would you do that? You spend all these episodes building up a character we were pre-programmed to hate into a docile little kitten that made people melt all over themselves just looking at, and then you throw her to
Numb3rs: In Security
Wow, I make one innocent remark about how Liz clearly isn't cut out to be a longterm member of the Eppes family, and the next week she boots herself out the door. Convenient. I would be sad if I didn't feel more warmth and chemistry between Don and the Witness Safety woman (Leah?) we knew for all of five minutes before she got killed than I do between him and Liz. I mean yes, when I was being force-fed their relationship it only took one hair-tuck-behind-the-ear to make me melt in a puddle of goo, but that was more about maintaining my own personal sanity than actually accepting Liz. I just like Relationship Don. I will also accept Angsty/Emotionally Tortured Don, so this episode was pretty much perfect where he was concerned.
Alas, we devoted so much time to Don's girlfriends that there wasn't any room left over for Larry's or Charlie's. I understand the lack of Amita, since she starred last week and her presence is rarely crucial to case advancement, but I can't imagine why Megan wasn't working an important case like this. Someone really needed to lend Don support, since Liz was doing a piss-poor job of it (yes, David, I saw your angry defense in the beginning...I have to admit it was wonderful). I'm still not entirely sure what prompted her to break up with him - I fail to see how not telling her about a past relationship with a person currently under federal protection translates to constantly keeping secrets from her. But like I said, I won't mourn the absence of Miss Warner. (oh! wait, that's right, there was something in there about him tipping off someone with information...I couldn't follow all the twists there)
Long story short, the case was gripping and I was invested in every single second. As for Charlie's book - published hardcover! Yay! (I still want to buy a copy; somebody really needs to tap the untapped market of writing & publishing books created on TV shows. You know how many hits I get to my Xanga every month looking for "A Season for Peaches" + "real book"?) However, I don't believe that Charlie only had two squealing fangirls run up and beg for autographs (especially when I think they only had 1 copy between them). I'm pretty sure that even without knowing all the stuff the regular fangirls do, Charles Eppes is considered a Cute Professor, and at a big school like Cal Sci there must be a fair number of young women looking for a reason to come talk to him. Then again, maybe the scruff is scaring them away. AMITA, PLEASE, for the love of all that is holy and good teach him how to use a razor again.
Overall, solidly entertaining episode. I'm loving Numb3rs a whole bunch lately. (also: OMG IS IT NEXT FRIDAY YET?? Throwing Amita into the path of the danger is the fastest way to get me hyped up for an episode. I'm looking forward to this more than anything else next week, including the half-drowned Gibbs on NCIS which had been my previous highlight. I can't remember the last time Numb3rs was the highlight of my week)
Without a Trace, 6x05, "Run"
See, it doesn't take that much to hook me into a WaT episode. All I demand is a small hailstorm of bullets and a few dead bodies right off the bat in the teaser; is that so much to ask? For the record, I would like to state that this was the first episode I watched all season. It was tolerably enjoyable, as evidenced by the fact that I didn't fast-forward for even one second. The MP's profile helped too, of course. When in doubt, go for females between the ages of 6 and 30. If you can't hook me with that, you've messed up badly.
Loved the storyline, was actively invested in every new turn (and there were about a thousand of them)...but I figured she'd been abused by her father as soon as her high school friend explained how she'd been "weird" in high school, fine after meeting Mike and then weird again once she had a daughter. I'd assumed the agents had made that leap too; I was flabbergasted when they cornered the woman and were under the impression that she was fleeing her ex-husband. Foolish agents. You suck at your jobs tonight. Grandpa was just a little too domineering and touchy-feely for me to feel at ease. Still, I'm glad it had a (fairly) happy ending, and neither the pretty woman nor her adorable little girl ended up dead, so that's a win in my book.
Color Interactions --
Yellow-Green: I was all prepared to make my "blech" face at Sam's pregnancy revelation, but Green M&M was nicely unresponsive. Okay, on the surface Elena seemed fairly sweet and accepting, but I'm pretty sure that was her way of saying "I don't care about your personal life, Samantha. I don't know if you've noticed, but just because I'm both your coworker and a mom doesn't mean there's a Ya-Ya Sisterhood thing going on here." Hah. (okay, okay, I suppose this can all be attributed to the fact that Sam was emotionless, but leave me to my fantasies in peace)
Yellow-Orange: Your cryptic remarks are confusing poor Martin! And Sam, you don't get to start speaking authoritatively about motherhood and maternal instinct when you're 3 months pregnant. No. Just...no. I do side with you on the whole kidnapping vs. whisking daughter to safety debate, though. So called child-napping is not always the result of one parent being crazy.
Yellow-Brown: Well THAT was awkward. On the one hand, I understand her rationale because it's the kind of thing your boss should know, especially if you're in a potentially dangerous field job like that. On the other, there's that whole AWKWARD EX-LOVER thing which is why you shouldn't sleep with your boss
Green-Brown: Taken individually, Elena is great with kids. And, even though I admit it only grudgingly, Jack can be pretty good too, especially with little girls. And individually, they were pretty cute while sitting with Jasmine in the hospital waiting room. But I'm just so, so tired of these two sharing screen time. I swear they work together more than any other pairing. Hey writers! Viv's a mom too! Remember that? Why don't you leave the parenting perspectives to her and Jack, eh?
Edit: Oh, and one more thing, because I forgot about the deleted scenes from The Office at the website and I just got to them now...I have to comment on them because they're so amazing. Like, "Branch Wars" was already pretty golden, and then NBC offered 20% more PURE GOLD. They contained a lot of important expository bits, though, that would have made some of the transitions in Thursday's episode a lot smoother. I'm sure we could have cut some of the boring "Michael whines over Stanley" crap...especially the scene where he's drafting an ad for his replacement. That added nothing.
Deleted Scene #1: Okay, this kind of shattered a lot of the great conclusions I drew about the Finer Things Club and made it seem slightly meaner, but I maintain that it was founded specifically on this trio's desire to meet and discuss books, not simply one person's desire to meet and discuss books with whoever seemed best qualified, and so I feel justified by Toby's sad, sad whispering that he likes it with just the 3 of them and doesn't want it to change (yeah Toby! Boooo change!). The bit about him listening in on his wife's book club was a great tidbit too - I TOLD you he was there for more than just Pam (though that's clearly a nice bonus for him). I'm still not sure why Meredith sulks about not being in it, but I suspect she's used to being invited to everything and thus assumes she's the life of any party. It's probably just a bruise to her ego.
I love that Pam initially looked shocked at Oscar's unconditional acceptance of Andy's cash bribe, but by the end had made the perfect choice - let Andy be wait-listed, and in the meantime, feel free to continue being a "financial patron." Free money for books & food (hey, gourmet's not cheap), and they still don't have to deal with his physical presence -- and he's happy with that arrangement. Win-win-win!
Deleted Scene #2: And then, in case the trip to Utica wasn't already perfect, come two more minutes of pure gold, including:
- the naming of all the remaining DM branches
- why Jim was riding in the front seat rather than Dwight (answer: because Michael decreed it so, obviously. You didn't think he'd do that willingly?)
- Jim/Pam phone conversation (I KNEW he was trying to call Pam the first time)
- confirmation that without his intervening presence, someone would indeed "go to jail. Or die."
- the visual image of Michael & Dwight pinned between the stairwell wall and the giant copier, along with the shooting of silly string and a security guard wiping his eyes after being maced by Dwight
- footage from the drive home (on the one hand, there go my speculations about Jim threatening to cause bodily harm to the obnoxious camera guy. On the other, we get to hear more of Michael whining about how Jim should have just slept with Karen - Pam would have understood! - and getting little to no response from Stonewall Halpert, who at this moment is literally too pissed off for words.)
Speaking of the phone conversation...it was adorable right up until the Karen reference, and then it just got uncomfortable. Despite what Pam says about kidding around, I somehow don't think they do a lot of joking about Roy. I would think this would still be a touchy topic best left alone, at least this early in their relationship, especially since Jim doesn't seem to find it quite as funny as she does. Methinks Pam needs to knock it off, immediately.
Okay...NOW I'm done. My sleeping patterns have adapted themselves to a weird starve/binge cycle where I stay up for 24-30 hours and then crash for 12-14. As you may have deduced, any day on which I post reviews (or have a paper or lab report due, although you don't see that) is probably after a night with no sleep. What can I say; writing is easiest in long, uninterrupted stretches - preferably at night, without sunshine or people walking around to provide distraction.
I feel accomplished for getting all that done; it's still Sunday morning and the tiredness hasn't hit me yet (25 hours awake and counting, although I'm coming off a night of 13 hours of sleep. Which in turn was coming off a night of 90 minutes, but...). Maybe I'll do homework now! Or...I could procrastinate by cleaning the apartment and going shopping. I believe I'll procrastinate.