Private Practice: In Which Cooper DOES HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE, UNMENTIONABLE THINGS FOR WHICH HE SHOULD BE BEATEN WITH SHARP STICKS
I am so fed up with this show. They had this awesome, awesome, non-dirty, non-physical thing going for them, and then they just SHATTERED every last trace of it. What the hell? Do you know why Grey's Anatomy sucks? Do you know what made you better than Grey's Anatomy? Me neither, because you've obliterated all evidence of it. Besides which, Charlotte King was a stupid, useless and cardboard character anyway, but she has zero to less than zero chemistry with Cooper. They actually have negative chemistry. Compared to them, Pete and Addison - hell, even Dell and Naomi - are a smoking cauldron of hot, strong love. And according to the previews, their "relationship" is going to become a regular thing? The writers are clearly not on strike, but crack.
No, I'm not at all bitter. In order to prove how not-bitter I am, I will pretend that Cooper does not exist and try to focus on some other parts of this episode. Like how Addison can cradle and croon to a baby, and suddenly make me not only want her to become a mother ASAP, but make me look at the baby and think it's cute. (NO. NO, THAT'S A LIE, I WILL NOT ADMIT TO THINKING ANY SUCH THING!)
Um, um...oh! Sam and Naomi continue, after a minor slip-up last week, to be awesome spouses, if crappy parents. (because nobody is ever, ever watching Maya at night, unless they've hired a live-in nanny) Admittedly, I was annoyed with Na's initial statement, "We got divorced for a reason." Um, what? The "reason" was that Sam randomly walked out on you; that's not a choice you made together! If Sam wants back in, you welcome him with open arms because you clearly do not function well as either a single or a single mom. She then proceeded to annoy me further by saying "God's trying to tell us something." Because a) no he wasn't, and b) if he was, the message would most likely be "divorce is wrong, you idiots, please get remarried now." Thus, the priest telling them at the end that they would always be married in the eyes of God brought me all kinds of validation.
My only question is, why do we have to bring Dell into it next week?
Wow, I still haven't focused on one purely positive thing in this episode. Umm...oh! The ending! That was such a sweet moment between Addison and Naomi. And see, this is how it should be all the time. Addison should be able to go to both her friends for support, because they should still be married and living together. Of course, in this fantasy life of mine, she shouldn't have to because she would still be happily married to Derek, but...there I go again with the complaining. Shut up. It ended on a nice friendship moment; that's all I need to pay attention to.
CSI: NY - One Wedding and a Funeral
Wedding case: boring
Puzzle case: fascinating!
I tire of listening to the grumblings in the fandom, or even trying to agree with them. I adore Mac. I think he is a fascinating character study, kind of like Horatio was before they replaced him with a robot, and I would much rather focus on him than anyone else on the series (with the possible exception of Flack). I've been enjoying the slow build to the 333 mystery, watching it steadily come together not unlike the 3-D puzzle, and each clue has been more tantalizing than the last. Suddenly, the bloody T-shirt seems mundane in comparison to the complex symbolism of the puzzle buildings. I love anything that delves into Mac's past, so this ep was a goldmine of information, though nothing so welcome as "I got engaged on that roof." Woohoo, indirect mentions of Claire! And the way everything tied to...the building in Chicago whose name I have forgotten? Very neat. I cannot believe how much I'm looking forward to next week. I've been keeping somewhat abreast of spoilers for this show and therefore have a general idea of the direction this is heading, but I still expect to be surprised when I actually watch it play out.
P.S. Danny, I don't know when you decided to adopt "Boom" as your personal catch phrase, but in about two more episodes its annoyance factor is going to surpass Horatio's sunglasses, so, cut it out.
Without a Trace: Fight/Flight a/k/a Baby Daddy Revealed
See "Law & Order: SVU." Extreme fighting is the most pathetic and uninteresting thing ever invented, and when you combine it with the dull casework of this show, it's a recipe for death by boredom. So instead, I shall focus on the meatier-than-usual helping of personal drama this week. It's no "At Rest," but I'll take what I can get.
A little more baby drama this week. Totally unnecessary baby drama, but we got to find out the father of Samantha's baby (hey, it's that guy! The guy whose name she couldn't remember in the morning! Literally, it's the same guy. I'm actually sort of impressed with the continuity factor there). I pretty much figured that's where they were going with it, but it's nice to have it confirmed. What I do not understand is why she felt a need to go track him down and inform him of this fact only to immediately ask him to forfeit his parental rights. I assume she was just trying to cover her bases in case he ever found out and wanted to be part of their lives, since it's something she clearly doesn't want, but this begs the question: how would he ever have found out? It was a one-night stand. He barely remembered her. And even if he did, ran across her one day and for some reason connected the date of their encounter with the apparent age of her kid (UNLIKELY) who's to say she wasn't sleeping with a lot of random guys the same way she did with him? If she really wanted him to stay out of her life, it seems like the obvious solution would be to, you know, not go barging back into his.
Then there was her weirdly hostile attitude at his door, which I don't understand. Shockingly, while most men probably try to avoid impregnating their random sex dates, if and once this actually happens, it is not the dearest ambition of all men to immediately make the problem go away. Some of them might actual feel a tinge of...wait for it...responsibility! And perhaps...connection! To the child they fathered. I know this is difficult to understand, in your cold world devoid of love, but your random date from the bar might be a decent person. And in any case, he might not want to sign a legally binding document while half-asleep and without having had so much as a minute to think about it. There's no cause to throw a fit because he didn't hop-to in order to fulfill your commands.
Apparently, her solution is to get revenge by allowing the guy's girlfriend to think he's cheating on her. Honestly, Samantha. Did you really need to let that happen? Would it have been so hard to make up some excuse to keep her from freaking out? Since the ultimate goal of your plan is to keep him out of your life, it's not like she would even need to know that you were pregnant. I almost feel like I need to watch that scene again in order to figure out what I missed, but...that would require time and effort to download, and it's really not worth it.
Grey's Anatomy: Crash Into Me, Part I
WHOA! DRAMATIC AMBULANCE CRASH! What happened to the funny? You can't just spring intense February Sweeps drama on me like that in November! Now there are EMTs bleeding out while wives wail hysterically and break my heart even though they're minor characters we've never seen before, and...I was just not prepared for this at all. This is what happens when I not only stop reading spoilers, but watch the show online and thus never get to see previews. Anyway, this was less gripping than the ferry disaster, but at least as intriguing as the bomb arc, and I'm really on the edge of my seat to see the conclusion. Well, mostly the part where the computer failed and died in the middle of Derek's brain surgery. That was a major WHOA moment. Talk about worst case scenario...not to mention Derek will be having quite a bad month if he loses two patients in a row.
Don't really have an opinion on the swastika-tattoo patient; he was an ass and people like him are the reason no one listens to me when I insist that racism no longer exists, so thanks for that. (I'm sure you feel compelled to argue, but I've never seen it in MY life) Oh, wait...I can't call Bailey "The Nazi" anymore?? My life no longer has meaning. Please, please tell me they did not write this in because they caved to viewer complaint.
The only other patient case I feel compelled to discuss was Seth Green, because OH MY GOD I hate Seth Green so much, you don't even know. I think it's a combination of the roles he plays as well as the actor himself, such as I have seen him on various award shows, but he always strikes me as a disgusting little creep. This episode did nothing to change my opinion. And that ending not only took me completely by surprise, but was actually more disgusting than the pencil in the eye. I had been peeking through my fingers to avoid seeing too much of whatever horrible thing was on his neck, because just the talk of it was making me squirm, but I thought it was safe to look up by that point. And suddenly it was OH GOD, DID NOT NEED!
It always worries me when they show moments I loved in the previouslies, particularly if said moments ended well, because it usually means they're about to blow up. The minute I saw the scene of Bailey smiling with her husband and new baby, I just went "Oh, fuck." And what do you know. Bailey doesn't even get A WEEK of being awesome at her new job before the Chief's prediction comes true and it starts destroying her home life, which I find so completely unfair. Shonda Rhimes has this weird aversion to women balancing professional and domestic lives, but come on, this is BAILEY! I fail to understand why the writers cannot just have ONE functioning relationship on this show. They wouldn't even have to suffer the apparent torture of writing happy scenes for them, since Tucker is not actually a regular cast member. All they have to do is IGNORE THEM and NOT TALK ABOUT that aspect of her life. I went to check the writers' blog, but it hasn't been updated since the beginning of the month (does the WGA even prevent them from blogging about what they've already written?), which is a pity because I would really love to know how they justify this one. Under normal circumstances, I might believe that they were showing credible strain that might occur with a newer and more stressful job, except that nobody ever "rises above" and overcomes their strain in this universe. They just twist and strain until they break, and never get put back together again.
On the other hand, I perked up at the sight of Ava in the previews, and that actually went somewhere kind of good. That's TWICE she's come back for him now; I don't dare hope for a third time so he'd really better get his act together and talk this thing out. In the meantime, as much as I love Lexie (albeit slightly less after hearing that she was prom queen, and realizing that all of her mannerisms reflect a former popular girl rather than the mousy wallflower I'd been envisioning), I'm reaching a point where I want to strangle her with a shoelace. I just do not understand how someone can be that STUPID! In what twisted world can you possibly believe that someone who's happy to bang you anytime/anywhere for the sake of getting himself laid, in the ultimate act of piggish selfishness, can possibly be a decent guy? I realize this directly contradicts my fondest wishes for him to run off with Ava, but...well, Lexie's not Ava. She doesn't have any firsthand experience of him being attentive and caring with no sex involved. Also, please tell me this signaled the end of Alex tonguing Lexie, because the sight is really quite nauseating.
I don't understand why Izzie is suddenly insanely jealous of Meredith & Cristina, but I wish she'd shut up because they are the closest thing to an uninterrupted and functional relationship this show has ever had (even though their dancing looked asinine, as all uninhibited and unchoreographed dancing does). Besides which, there! Right there, was a golden opportunity for Gizzie cuteness, with Izzie bitching about them and their stupid dancing, and George wryly asking, "You want to dance?" All she had to do was take him up on his offer, and they could have done stupid, silly, playful-puppy-like waltzing around the room, and started giggling and gotten over all their awkwardness in one swoop. I'm convinced of it. Instead, she continued sulking in the doorway like the wet blanket she's become, and the moment passed, and the Epic Fail (non)Relationship continued to flounder.
I am officially being won over by the sheer adorableness of McDreamy/Rose. I haven't seen his charming smile in a while; I'd forgotten how it lights up the room when it's not weighed down by the perpetual look of sadness and disappointment behind it for the fact that Meredith isn't willing to reciprocate everything he wants to give. But the way he teased Nurse Rose about the licorice in her teeth...haha, I LOVE them. And frankly, I think it would be sort of awesome if this background nurse managed to snake the most charming doctor away from the loserly intern. Not for the first time, I've grown tired of Mer's stranglehold on him, the depressing way she clings ever-tighter to him, with neither ever seeming particularly happy with the outcome. Rose is a breath of much-needed fresh air, and I know she's not Addison, but I reverse my position from last week: she's a more than acceptable alternative. I suspect this benevolent attitude will last exactly until the point she first sheds her scrubs (not a spoiler, just my prediction), and then I will be disgusted and turned off by their dirty physical relationship, but while it's in the quasi-flirting stage and possibly into the early dating stages, I intend to love it.
And finally, Dr. Hahn, the *one* way you could make me like you is if you continue to rebuff McSleazy from here to eternity, and never accept so much as a civilized conversation with him - sleeping with him is OBVIOUSLY out of the question. I've been proud of you so far for mocking and deriding him at every opportunity, so I don't want to hear that you're using it as a defense mechanism against some strange and inexplicable attraction to him. Because it's actually possible to just plain HATE MARK. I've been doing it for well over a year now. He could badger me all day, every day for a month straight and I still wouldn't have a drink with him. He is sleazy and gross. Sleazy and gross cannot be overcome with massive amounts of fake charm, okay?!