RS (rainbowstevie) wrote,

Mix-n-Match Tuesday

Eventually, I am going to find a way to watch my ill-behaved 9 PM NBC shows.  Until then, I shall replace SVU with Survivor in this review set.

NCIS: 5x09, "Corporal Punishment"
I am not doing that stupid HIMYM not, am not, am not, and damn you.

The plot could scarcely have been more boring, but I very much enjoyed four aspects of it:
1. The 3-in-1 injuring of the team - I love when people get hurt, but when they all get hurt at the same time?  Woohoo!  Poor bandaged Tony, poor heavily bruised Ziva...McGee I don't really care about, but the first two should really set about comforting one another immediately.

2. Abby's "Oh my God oh my God oh my God" fretting over the aforementioned injuries - even though it stung just a teensy little bit when she failed to worry about Ziva in the same breath as Tony and McGee.  

3. The way in which Ziva calmed her down - which had a weirdly maternal quality to it, like Abby was her sulky teenage daughter, but I loved it anyway.  They have a fantastic dynamic and their friendship, such as it is, makes me all warm and fuzzy inside.  Also, not that I'm ADVOCATING this or anything, but I think I heard several dozen femslash icons being born out of that scene.  

4. Druggedup!Tony: "My fingers are finging."

Things which annoyed me:
1. Silly Abby, how could you confuse Season 5 Ziva with an emotionless warrior?  I'll grant you in season 3 she comes across that way, and maybe even in season 4 a bit, but she's since fallen dopey-in-love with the dead man walking, plus she waves her feelings for Tony like a bright red flag on a weekly basis, so...

2. I'm a little nauseated that she found anything attractive about Super Marine's display of animal strength and aggression, as it only made me grimace.  Besides, look at the nasty hair.  

3. I'm a little confused as to why Gibbs, with such a service background, doesn't support the war.  I would love to get a more in-depth look at why, if only to erase the suspicion that it mostly has to do with the character being commandeered as a mouthpiece to get someone else's agenda across with an innocuous throwaway line.  I bet it was one of those whiny writers.  
Bones, "The Santa in the Slush"
Okay, now THAT was a good episode.  So good that even after taking 48 hours to try and wrap my brain around its amazing-ness, I am still just sort of babbling incoherently.  A list of things I loved, let me show you it:

*Booth's brooding over not spending Christmas with Parker.  Aww, man needs a hug.

*Booth's giddy delight over entering the CHRISTMAS EXPLOSION apartment (I couldn't help but wonder, though, just what Kris did during the off-season.  I mean, it's awesome at Christmas, but does he really have that set up year-round?  What did he wear when the weather was appropriate for neither Santa suits nor holiday sweaters?)

*I in no way have an unhealthy obsession with Booth without whom this show would not be worth watching

*Everything about the Booth/Brennan kiss, except for the part where Booth ends up with her gum.  Because, gross.  I'd prefer not to think about how that's possible.  It's a Thing of mine, okay?  There's a reason I blast makeout scenes as much as bedroom ones.   Anyway, I knew ahead of time there was a twist, so I was not tricked by the lying, lying previews about how it was "the moment [I'd] waited 3 years to see," especially since I wasn't waiting for any such thing - it is not my deepest ambition to see them kiss.  I like the thought of them together, but I'm not particularly invested in it the way most people seem to be, and I don't think it would work on the show in any context.

Except this one!  Where people get a kiss to use for icons and banners and the like, without also having to make a relationship work on screen.  And more importantly (and hilariously), it happened because Caroline decided to go all Voice of the Viewing Audience and make it happen for purposes of our her own amusement, because she's feeling "puckish."  I love the way she says all of this COMPLETELY DEADPAN.  I feel like I don't give the woman enough love, especially since she's better than Cam and Zack combined (was I the only one who wanted to punch Zack in the face when he suggested that children would have to be idiots to believe that Santa was capable of delivering toys all over the world?).  So, for the record, I LOVE HER.  Why can't she be in the credits instead of Sweets?

*Angela wanting to make Christmas decorations.  To continue a family tradition in her new one.  "Are two people a family?" Hodgins asks, and while she tragically does not reply with a comment about how they're soon to be three, I will accept in its stead "Isn't that how every family starts?"   And while I could do without the suddenly intrusive Piano Notes of Schmaltz that suddenly interrupt the otherwise silent background noise, I am in love with the cheek kiss, and the amazing way he looks at her after that.  After their endless rounds of lab sex and makeout sessions, I was starting to forget why I'd fallen in love with them.  But that is why.  Because the way they look at each other in those quiet moments is the stuff dreams are made of.  

Also, if they're a family now, despite the lack of legally binding documents saying so, can I please, please, PLEASE let my guard down and assume they're set in this happy ending, and the show will be content to focus on needling Booth & Brennan for relationship drama?  PLEASE?

*I still can't stand Max, but Russ is being infuriatingly adorable as a stepdad to equally adorable little girls, and I find I can no longer hate him.  The part where said girls' eyes light up at the sight of him and then go zooming across the room like little magnets is so CUTE that I had to rewind it a time or four. 

*And for the Trifecta of Cute, Parker's back!  I cannot believe how cute that kid is.  (honestly, can't believe it.  Little boys are not supposed to be likable)  The only thing I rewound more than Jack/Angela was him running to Booth at the end.  They fill me with so much joy. 

*The happy office gift exchange, even though I had to mute the noise of the extremely irritating musical track.  I hate the sound of children singing.  I'm not much for choirs in general, but the reedy voices of children are the worst of all.  Also, what is the purpose of that ridiculously giant and tacky red rose on Cam's slinky black dress?  Something that ostentatious is only suitable - maybe - for a paso doble on Dancing With the Stars. 

*The case itself was not the most compelling mystery ever - when I can figure out who the bad guy is, that's saying something - but it was extremely entertaining; not once did I feel the need to start skipping ahead in boredom (did have to skip for grossness when they were checking to see who had sat in the birds nest soup, though).  Every interaction with the Santa mob was golden.

*The spoilers for this episode said "Booth is back to using his gun inappropriately."  Alas, to my intense disappointment, he did not shoot Sweets between the eyes.   Honestly, this would have been a perfect episode if not for the scene including him.

*Finally, Booth & Parker setting up a Christmas tree outside at the end for Jailbirds & Co.  PERFECT ENDING.

I was really considering saving this episode for a day slightly closer to Christmas, and I kind of wish I had because it was so perfectly holiday-themed, but I couldn't resist the lure of the new ep.   And just like that, Bones is out for the year.  (the year of 2007, that is, although if the writers don't stop being whiny little children soon...)  Stellar way to close; I'll be happy with that ep for a while. 
House, 4x09, "The Game"
Um...Thirteen's coming back, right?  Because when House fired her, I literally SCREAMED IN OUTRAGE.  You - no way - you - out of all those people, you kept Plastic Surgeon and Kumar?  I actually hate Kutner more than Cutthroat Bitch - and I hate her so much that not once have I referred to her by her proper name - and I still don't understand how Cole got fired when Taub didn't.  I'll be over here, bashing my head against a wall.  My dream team = Cole & Thirteen.  I'm happy I get one of them back, but if I have to spend too much longer looking at Kutner's idiotic, vapid expression, someone is going to get hurt.  So not kidding. 

Thirteen, on the other hand, intrigues me.  Maybe it's her eyes - her expression is the complete and total opposite of Kutner's, very closed-off and mysterious.  Everyone keeps whining that she's a Cam clone, but again: Cam has the same blank expression of vapidity that Kutner does.  Thirteen calculates everything and keeps it close.  She doesn't show off, and doesn't pry.  At the moment, she seems to be the only one of the candidates who cares about her patients more than the game, but has yet to become quite so bleeding-heart as Cam, whose name I have long been tempted by </a></font></b></a>house_mst to rewrite as CaMoron at all times.

Two paragraphs in and I still can't remember the patient of the week, which just goes to show you how unmemorable he or she was.  Oh, right the punk rocker.  And that's all the more I have to say about him, because he really was that boring.  And is it just me, or is this the second week in a row where there's been so much going on that the diagnosis is just sort of tossed in near the end of the episode, rather than being the high point?  I didn't even know what it ended up being until I went online to read the recap.

Hm.  That's all I have to say, other than poor Wilson and his misdiagnosed, now sue-happy patient.  Although really, that man is just another example of why, when told you have a limited amount of time to live, you should not immediately burn all your bridges and decimate your savings with all possible haste.  Don't these people ever have FAMILIES to think about?

Meh, weak storyline for Wilson, is what I'm getting at.  And now House is out for the year too.  Much less stellar closing than Bones.  
Survivor: Episode 10
FINALLY.  Could they have mentioned the twist any more times before they got around to airing this episode and letting us know what the frick it was?  I have to hand it to them, though; everyone and their mother thought it was going to be a surprise extra vote, until I'd actually forgotten that it was only unconfirmed speculation, so I really WAS surprised when Jeff pulled out a random reward challenge instead. 

I keep cycling back and forth on whether I love/hate PG.  Right now I think I love her, because she was just SO excited that she won the reward to the temple (especially based on her performance in a quiz about Chinese culture), and usually I hate people obsessing over cultural things, but this isn't the type of culture they usually shove down my throat during Diversity Appreciation Day, so I'm actually able to be impressed by and interested in it.  Plus, I was quite pleased with her picks, since I like the way she and Erik have become unlikely allies, the outsiders clinging to a place in the game far longer than anyone (themselves included) might have expected.  And I'm SO happy she also picked Denise, who needed something special after that mean schoolyard pick.  The fact that it happened to line up with one of her major interests was just the icing on the cake.  

When Amanda started talking about how she was looking around at her alliance and thinking she didn't feel safe with any of them, I sat bolt upright and realized I didn't like any of them either, except possibly Courtney, but she swings in and out of my favor nearly as much as PG.  I spent the rest of the episode hoping against hope that Amanda would turn on all the lame people and propose a new F4, made up of the people previously slated for booting.  It would be made of Win if she got the, let's face it, spoiled and lazily complacent people out of the running and instead went with a new team composed of underdogs.  And with James now gone (DO A HAPPY DANCE YAY), it's kind of going that way anyway, for the third season in a row, which is wonderful.  

Twitchy Todd is really the only obstacle to my pure happiness at this point; otherwise I'd be satisfied with anyone winning right now.  Even Denise.  Looking at her still makes me uncomfortable, but at least I recognize that she's a genuinely nice and good person, and she would be the most deserving, most average person ever to win this competition.  That being said, Erik is still my clear favorite (because he's exactly the type of guy I always end up having a crush on, and...this is no exception), with Amanda in second place (because tall, slim brunettes are closest to my idealized vision of myself).   

Oh, and a quick mention of the reward challenge - throwing stars!  Yay!  I do love the challenges where they have to hit targets with stuff.  I'm not fussy, really...blow guns, bows and arrows, slingshots; it's all good.  Throwing stars are a nice variation, though.  And I'm glad they nixed that stupid effect whereby every time a person was going to land their mark, the camera went into slow-mo action. 
Tags: bones, house, ncis, survivor, tv commentary

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