*headdesk for the second week in a row*
Now you're just feeding fire to the dragon. You're going to have me get my rant on for two social issues in the same episode?
Issue the First: Female circumcision
"It's supposed to keep them from becoming promiscuous."
Well, it does its job, doesn't it? If it causes you excruciating pain to have sex, or at least deadens all sensation, you're much less likely to hop into bed with whoever vaguely strikes your fancy, aren't you? I'm just saying, the execution is all wrong, but the underlying principles aren't at fault.
That being said, because my hatred of promiscuity pales in comparison to my hatred of cultural practices that vary too widely from mine, the mere mention of FGM causes me to go blind with red rage. There is no argument for it. Ever. Certainly not by brainwashed females determined to uphold "tradition." There is nothing I despise more than the argument of "I did it so the next generation should too," particularly if what you did was unpleasant. You take revenge on the instigators, people, you don't pay it forward.
Stabler had some delightfully kick-ass lines in this one; I don't remember them all because I missed the first ten minutes of the ep and thereafter didn't pay strict attention, but for one of them the circumciser tried to argue that the practice had been carried on for hundreds of years (like foot-binding in China?), and he shot back "Welcome to the 21st century; mutilation is a felony."
The lady continued to earn my ire by defending that it was "no different from Jewish male circumcision." Really? How about the part where it frequently causes infection and scar tissue and lifelong medical problems? Nope, not seeing a lot of parallels here.
I would delve into further research on this subject, because I feel like I could spend several weeks learning about it and still not understand all the issues, but I think I would end up smashing something through the computer screen, so I'm going to back away now. And bump into
Issue the Second: Polygamy
Funnily enough, polygamy annoys me less than various other varieties of non-traditional relationships. For whatever reason, I feel like I can understand how this arrangement can work for people, especially those with children involved. I'm skeptical of the idea that the relationship with each wife is equally strong, and I cannot conceive of how it could truly be as romantic or run as deep as a monogamous couple, but the mention of it doesn't make my skin twitch. Unless, of course, you try to defend the idea that it's better than traditional...wow, the irony just hit me all at once there; I will justify it with the fact that I believe myself to be the Pending Dictator of Earth, and so MY traditions can be upheld...anyway. Monogamy > polygamy > casual affairs. There, that's a basic outline of my beliefs.
That being said, the line that made vomit up my stomach and choke on it: "We're a global society now. The U.S. needs to be more tolerant."
*explodes with rage*
First of all, just the word "global" is liable to set me off, for a whole host of reasons I refuse to get into because this post would literally go up in flames (yes Ted, LITERALLY) from all the incendiary commentary/comments. Second of all, why exactly do we need to be more tolerant? Why is it that "get off your high horse, Rich Country," is just ingrained in people as an automatic response? Maybe there are ways in which my culture is more awesome than yours. Third of all, out of everything we could improve about this intolerant society of ours, that's what you want to focus on? Really? Priorities, lady, please to be having them.
Like I said, I wasn't really paying strict attention to the case. Just enough to note that I really liked and felt sorry for the guy, and that OF COURSE it was the psycho jealous white woman who turned out to be the murderer in the end, and I'm so glad that the otherwise happy ending didn't get yanked at the last second. I fully expected at least one other member of that family to get shot as revenge for his snitching, no matter how hard the detectives were trying to protect them. But I guess TPTB felt like being nice for the holidays.
Also, Elliot, didn't your wife just have a baby? I'm all for them pretending that never happened, but it still struck me as odd that he personally volunteered to stay with the family for protection.
If that's not your subject matter of choice, we can move along to a fun little music meme I dredged up and whose instructions I may have altered slightly for clarification purposes.
Here's the gig. Go to www.musicoutfitters.com. Type the year of your high school graduation [or first year, if still in high school] into the search function. Retrieve the Top 100 songs from that year. Strike through the songs you hate(d). Underline the songs you like(d). Bold the songs you love(d). Leave blank those you don't care about or don't remember. Annotate at will.
Top 100 Songs of 2004
-Oh GOD, I must have heard this 5,000 times a week. The singer sounded like he was yawning through the song; I hated it so much. And that was on top of the hate I already had for the stupid, horrible, smelly-sounding band name.
2. This Love, Maroon 5
-Meh. If I only hear it once in a while, it's okay, but it grates on my nerves quite quickly through overplay.
3. Yeah, Usher featuring Ludacris & Lil' Jon
4. Leave (Get Out), JoJo
5. She Will Be Loved, Maroon 5
-I didn't hear this until 2005, but the second I did, WHAM! In love the second I heard Look for the girl with the broken smile. It remains a champion in my beloved collection of "Isolée" songs.
6. Pieces Of Me, Ashlee Simpson
-All my Ashlee Simpson music knowledge comes courtesy of my freshman year roommate playing her CD. A lot. I hated the fact that I sort of liked it.
7. With You, Jessica Simpson
8. The Way You Move, Outkast
9. My Immortal, Evanescence
-You do not even know how much I loved this song. I heard it about a month before graduation, not on the radio but from a girl singing it at the choir's annual event, where the choir members each chose a pop song to perform solo or in duet. It was so haunting that I couldn't look it up fast enough when I got home. And for the last month of school and into summer, it became my song to live by, as I wept over graduation and everyone I would miss, all the people I adored but wasn't really friends with, and would therefore no longer have any opportunity to see. "But though you're still with me, I've been alone all along."
10. My Happy Ending, Avril Lavigne
-Sometimes my roommate's incessant music playing was a good thing. I didn't even know she had a new CD out, and then I heard this song and it was "MUST ACQUIRE RIGHT NOW."
11. My Boo, Usher & Alicia Keys
12. Burn, Usher
13. Toxic, Britney Spears
14. If I Ain't Got You, Alicia Keys
15. Breakaway, Kelly Clarkson
-One of my favorite Kelly songs; I love her voice but I love it best when she strikes a balance between the ultra-slow ballads and that hard rocker-chick thing she so heavily promoted with "Since U Been Gone." And even though I can't relate to the lyrics at all, I like the way it weaves a story.
16. Dare You To Move, Switchfoot
17. Dip It Low, Christina Milian
18. Over And Over, Nelly featuring Tim McGraw
19. Hey Mama, Black Eyed Peas
20. Meant To Live, Switchfoot
21. Lose My Breath, Destiny's Child
22. I Don't Want To Be, Gavin DeGraw
23. Naughty Girl, Beyoncé Knowles
24. Let's Get It Started, Black Eyed Peas
-I think I've heard this one, probably as a result of those commercials in the year that Black Eyed Peas music was used to sell EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE. But that doesn't mean I have to like it.
25. On The Way Down, Ryan Cabrera
-I have no excuse for why I like this song, but I do. I love the beat. I cannot resist singing along with the chorus.
26. I Don't Want You Back, Eamon
27. Falls On Me, Fuel
28. Roses, Outkast
29. One Thing, Finger Eleven
30. Move Ya Body, Nina Sky
31. I Don't Wanna Know, Mario Winans featuring Enya & P. Diddy
32. Broken, Seether featuring Amy Lee
-Because Amy Lee's voice is beautiful. And even though "Seether" is a name that incites a knee-jerk reaction of unpleasantness, their voices intertwine in a poignant duet.
33. Everytime, Britney Spears
34. The First Cut Is The Deepest, Sheryl Crow
-I always think I like Sheryl Crow's music, but then I realize all of her recent songs are duds and I just have residual love for the mention of Scully in "A Change Will Do You Good." (in retrospect, it occurs to me that the point of that line was that it wasn't Mulder she was with, but I chose to believe otherwise)
35. Scandalous, Mis-Teeq
36. The Voice Within, Christina Aguilera
37. Take My Breath Away, Jessica Simpson
38. Turn Me On, Kevin Lyttle
-This is when I knew my radio station had gone insane. Something about this song just triggered an image of Santana, or maybe Conan O'Brien's band, neither of which I like, and I haven't been able to stand it since.
40. 1985, Bowling For Soup
-Instant love for this song, which makes no sense what with the scratchy-voiced male singers and the excessive elecrtic guitar, but I do like songs that tell stories. And this was a good one, the woman looking around and realizing that the last 20 years have passed her by. I feel like that will be me in the future. "When did Motley Crue become classic rock?"
41. Ocean Avenue, Yellowcard
42. Don't Tell Me, Avril Lavigne
-This is where Avril officially earned my undying love and respect for singing about a girl breaking up with her boyfriend for pressuring her to sleep with him. Which is exactly the kind of message that her target demographic needs to hear. It makes me happy.
43. Confessions Part 2, Usher
45. Eighth World Wonder, Kimberly Locke
-Wait, she produced a hit song? Really? Why did I not ever hear of this? I loved her.
46. Me, Myself And I, Beyoncé Knowles
47. Sunshine, Lil Flip
48. Baby It's You, JoJo
49. Numb, Linkin Park
50. Goodies, Ciara
51. Welcome To My Life, Simple Plan
52. Drop It Like It's Hot, Snoop Dogg
-*stabs stupid singer* And yet...I find it catchy.
53. Come Clean, Hilary Duff
-Didn't hear this until 2006. Prior to that, I was annoyed with Hilary for not being content with acting. Then I heard this song on a commercial for something, and it was instant love, long before I knew who sang it.
54. My Band, D12 featuring Eminem
55. One Call Away, Chingy
56. Hold On, Good Charlotte
57. Freek-A-Leek, Petey Pablo
-Theoretically, John Mayer should be everything I love in a musician. And yet, I cannot stand him. This song is as aggravating as his others; they're all so slow that I feel like I need to throw a rope around them to drag them forward. Plus I really don't want to think about the progression of girls to lovers. It was disturbing enough when the girl I babysat for went on her first date.
59. Tipsy, J-Kwon
60. Slow Jamz, Twista featuring Kanye West & Jamie Foxx
61. Are You Gonna Be My Girl, Jet
-This is on a commercial, yes? I don't hate it, but I dislike it.
62. Just Lose It, Eminem
63. The Trouble With Love Is, Kelly Clarkson
-Remember what I said about her slow ballads?
64. Hotel, Cassidy featuring R. Kelly
65. I Like That, Houston
66. Bounce, Sarah Connor
67. Lady, Lenny Kravitz
68. Slow Motion, Juvenile
69. I Miss You, Blink-182
70. Feelin' Way Too Damn Good, Nickelback
71. My Place, Nelly
72. Dirt Off Your Shoulder, Jay-Z
73. Vertigo, U2
74. You Don't Know My Name, Alicia Keys
75. Gigolo, Nick Cannon
76. White Houses, Vanessa Carlton
-I hate a certain verse a LOT. It took my unconditional Vanessa love and shattered it into a million pieces, which her third album has only just begun to restore. However, I love the rest of it - that gorgeous feeling of summer nostalgia she imbues into the words, the piano - and since I finally saw the music video for it, even THAT VERSE has cooled somewhat, and just another part of the memories in the song.
77. Let's Go, Trick Daddy
78. You And I Both, Jason Mraz
79. Overnight Celebrity, Twista
80. (I Hate) Everything About You, Three Days Grace
81. Only One, Yellowcard
82. Change Clothes, Jay-Z
-They overplayed this in a commercial, and I went from thinking it was okay to wanting to stab things whenever I heard it
84. Echo, Trapt
85. I'm Still In Love With You, Sean Paul
86. Breaking The Habit, Linkin Park
87. Shadow, Ashlee Simpson
-See previous Ashlee Simpson song. I like this one a little better, because it almost makes her sympathetic
88. What You Waiting For?, Gwen Stefani
89. How Come, D12
90. Slow, Kylie Minogue
91. Some Girls (Dance With Women), JC Chasez
92. Vindicated, Dashboard Confessional
93. God Is A DJ, Pink
94. Lean Back, Terror Squad
95. Accidentally In Love, Counting Crows
-Even though I associate this with Shrek, and I HATE all things Shrek, the song is kind of bouncy and fun so I let it carry me away.
96. Just A Little While, Janet Jackson
97. Away From The Sun, 3 Doors Down
98. Angels, Jessica Simpson
99. Locked Up, Akon
100. Not Today, Mary J. Blige featuring Eve
Everyone else should now proceed to play this game.