Well, actually it might be more like a meme and three small novellas. (Speaking of memes, I had such fun with the music one that I've been winding my way through the last decade, building a playlist of nostalgic radio hits on radioblogclub.com. It's delightful. It also reminds me that I had really poor taste in 7th grade, as my formerly beloved hits by people like Monica, Brandy, and Barenaked Ladies are getting kicked off the list before they have a chance to play twice. Backstreet Boys and Spice Girls are holding steady, though.)
Year at a Glance: Post the first sentence of the first entry of the month for every month of the year.
Oftentimes the title is really the first line of the post, so I'm substituting it where applicable. Also, if the first sentence is too short to mean anything, it gets a second to supplement it.
February - First of all, I did not realize how much the Tritter storyline was dragging this show down until it wasn't there anymore.
March - CSI: NY - Now THAT'S the way to end your sweeps period!
April - Wow, I have a list of discussion topics about a mile long...be catching up on those as quick as I can.
May - Much like the show itself, Idol reviews are quick and easy to produce.
June - I love reality shows that are sort of a blend between reality and a scripted storyline.
July - Oh, Goblet of Fire. Your character botching and plot rewrites make me SO VERY SAD.
August - It is I! Rainbow Stevie! Returned from the North Shore!
September - Nominations are now open at </a></font></b></a>csifanficawards , which is a wholly awesome place and may in fact have been the tipping point in convincing me to create an LJ, so dig out your bookmarks and send in your favorite stories of the 06-07 season.
October - Disclaimer: Part of my lack of enjoyment in this episode [NCIS season premiere] may have been due to the fact that I watched it at 2 in the morning when I was supposed to be doing homework, plus I watched it on the CBS online player, where it buffered every 10 seconds and took 75 minutes to get through 42 minutes of episode.
November - Wednesday really should be in here too, but it was too amazing to wrap my head around in 24 hours, and now I have a Lit paper that needs writing.
December - Eventually, I am going to find a way to watch my ill-behaved 9 PM NBC shows.
Private Practice: In Which Dell Finds His Fight
Where do I even begin with this one? Um...oh, I know, how about the one thing that didn't piss me off: late-blooming virgin and her supposedly hot but actually rather plain and ordinary husband, and the fact that they would really like to have a baby. If this is coming off as mockery, I apologize, because they really have been the best visitors to Oceanside yet. My cynicism stems from the fact that I keep fearing their many problems down there are going to cause them to break up, because George and Izzie are the poster children for how Sex Means Everything in Shondaland.
Fortunately, my fears did not come to fruition, and even though I think whatever solution Addison and Naomi was grounded more strongly in magic than science - how many people can come in for a fertility consultation, get their results, rope in a family member as a sperm donor, reject that idea and come up with a different one, AND have a fertilized embryo implanted in the space of a few days? And that's not even taking into account the fact that Addison had it ready to go after about ten seconds of poking around - it made me happy, so I won't argue it. If ever two people deserved a happy ending, it's them. Just don't make her come in three months from now with a miscarriage, or I'll hurt people. I'm torn between wanting to see them again, and knowing that to do so would all but guarantee a tragic outcome of some sort.
I lied; there were two things that didn't piss me off: the aforementioned couple, and Addison fabulously arranging a date with Kevin the Cop, which had the added benefit of thwarting Pete's last-ditch attempt to declare his lust for her. At least for one more episode, which won't be arriving for a good long while, so I can enjoy holiday break without the mentally scarring image of Addie/Pete taking over my brain. Alas, I will still have to deal with Dell snogging Naomi, and it might take me a while to get over that.
Speaking of that, let's talk about Dell. The storyline about his grandfather was weak and not particularly interesting; for one thing, it was impossible not to see the man as Jack Gallo from "Just Shoot Me," and therefore impossible to believe he was infirm enough to require nursing home care. I was also almost positive that he and his roommate where having an illicit affair, because that's what this show does to my brain. The illicit fight club angle wasn't much better, though, so I'm going to ignore it except for the larger effect it had of showcasing the interaction between Dell and Sam, which is a relationship dynamic that I am newly fascinated with. If you leave Naomi out of the equation, I think they'd actually have a great deal of respect for one another; while Cooper and Pete spend their time standing around discussing women, Sam's running a practice he helped found (yeah, yeah, co-op; Sam & Naomi are still clearly in charge) and writing books and everything else. And Sam seems to recognize that Dell has a good head on his shoulders - he's a smart kid.
But that's the thing: "HE. IS. A. CHILD." Closer in age to her daughter than her, he has no business lamenting about how he's in love with Naomi; he could love her the way she deserves if she gave him a chance. Because, no. He can believe all he wants about loving her, and I'll even give him the benefit of the doubt that he has an emotional investment here rather than being a pure horndog, but it's not love. It's infatuation. Which frustrates me, because he is a really amazing guy, and he gets intense and emotional in a way that is terribly attractive, and I wish he would fall in love with some pretty classmate of his instead
He also needs to not get in the way of Sam and Naomi, who are forever married in my eyes (and God's, so nyah!), and are just going through a bit of a rough patch that they need to iron out. I choose to believe that Sam will be less of an idiot this time around, and make it stick. Their kiss at the end was quite hot, although I found myself desperately wishing Naomi had had time to drink a glass of water before he grabbed her. All I could think was "Ew, ew, ew, Dell was just there..."
Other things grossing me out: Cooper and Charlotte's sick, twisted, dirty relationship. I throw up in my mouth a little whenever I see them, and it's driving a serious wedge into my Cooper/Violet love, because the more nights he spends with her, the less I want him to touch Violet with those tainted hands. Ms. King leaves a stain that can't be scrubbed off. The anonymous internet women were one thing, because they were anonymous, and my brain can handle compartmentalized, emotionless sex as a series of past mistakes that you (after subjecting him to a rigorous battery of STD tests) could pretend never happened. But...Charlotte! As a standing appointment!
I pretty much think C/V has been handled all wrong from the beginning, though, from forcing it WAY too early - it was cute enough, but also reminded me of the kind of romance you write when you expect your show to get canceled quickly, so you go all-out, now or never to make sure it happens on screen - to the disastrous friends-with-benefits attempt, and now to this, apparently having given us the 'ship for the express purpose of taking it away. I mean, it's possible that if not for the way it was wrecking things with Vi, I might not totally despise the pair.
No, that's a lie. I totally would. But I least I wouldn't be griping bitterly about the lack of playful C/V banter lately. I know I said they weren't Jim and Pam, and they're not, but I was getting used to them being faint imitations, and then suddenly it was gone. *sniff*
'Grey's Anatomy: Crash Into Me, Pt. 2
[Random Note: Ah-hah-hah...even if I chop out the caps lock, this review is as long as my final Lit paper that I haven't started needs to be WHY ARE THE PARADOXES OF GENDER FREEDOM NOT THIS EXCITING?]
That was significantly better than part the first, but it still had some shortcomings, such as the squeaking music in the beginning. Oh my God. I had to hit the mute button, it was so annoying. In fact, it took me over a minute to realize that they were showing snippets of the conclusion first and then hitting the rewind button, although rest assured I revved my anger right back up. Well, take all the suspense out of it, why don't you? Stupid. And the worst part of all was Seth Green and THE SPEWING ARTERY EVERYWHERE OMG GROSS; I was largely succesful at shielding my eyes from it last time, and then this time I got the jarring visual twice when I wasn't expecting it. I may need assistance uncurling from the fetal position. It got to the point where I couldn't even look at the screen if they were in his room; I just steadfastly focused at a spot on the wall and waited for it to be over.
As for Bailey and Tucker, I found myself getting far more frustrated with her than with him. There are a lot of surgeons in that hospital, and you've clearly worked long past the end of your shift. Call someone else to take over for you, stop sending George to be your messenger boy, and TALK TO YOUR DAMN HUSBAND. JESUS H. CHRIST.
And Alex & Ava...?? *weeps* Why do you keep beatin' on my poor OTP? Okay, maybe it's more like a fourth-tier OTP, but I still like them, and I've never stopped believing in their potential. Until tonight. Until Alex called her out on being there on nothing but a booty call, and then she didn't disagree. And then, after taking a brief timeout to spit some more holier-than-thou accusations about the fact that she was married - WHAT is his deal with the bonds of matrimony? The way these people bed-hop, I can't believe they consider marriage any more sacrosanct or permanent than most people in Hollywood do - he went ahead and slept with her anyway. *sigh*
Is she really there for nothing more than an escape into fantasy? I never read her using "Ava" like a mask for temporary escape, I read it like coming into a new identity to go with her new face, that what happened with the ferry disaster irrevocably shook off the vestiges of her old life, taking with it something that couldn't be restored with the memories.*** If it's really meaningless, and Alex is once again taking advantage of an emotionally screwed-up woman to get his rocks off, then this is just stupid, and has once again destroyed my ability to believe Alex has a shred of humanity in his body and/or will grow up into a better man than Mark Sloan.
...wow, there was a lot more to hate than I remembered. Why did I like it more than part 1, again? It must have kept me entertained somehow.
Let's talk about Nurse Rose, because I like her. Rose is a fresh, new, and very welcome face. Her eyes are bright and alert, unlike Meredith's, which are always so drooping that they don't even seem to reflect light unless she's crying. And she has a gorgeous smile, on the rare occasion it's not hidden behind a mask. She's bright and perky, though in a less annoying manner than Lexie. In short, she is everything Meredith is not - including age-appropriate and mature - and I'm pretty sure that is precisely why I love her. I cheered for her kick-ass and heroic computer skills (though I loved McDreamy and his steady hands taking over when she was too shaky to do more than give verbal instructions, especially since Intern
When Limp Dishrag Mer strolled up to lay her possessiveness on Derek, my roommate incessantly chanted "Tell her about the kiss, McDreamy! Tell her!" I informed her about my policy of renaming him McDummy at times like this, but my heart wasn't in the words, because I really don't want him to get back with Meredith right now. The way she said "That may not be enough, but I'm trying" followed by a whole lot of phrases like "I don't want you to date anyone but me" with that big, beaming smile on her face, so proud of herself, just made me roll my eyes. It's not anywhere near enough. If the only thing you know is that you want to keep him for yourself, regardless of whether or not you're actually ready to be his full-time girlfriend, that's nothing short of selfish. This is the kind of speech I might buy from, oh, a high school virgin, but not Mer.
Meredith bored me to tears throughout most of the episode. Once Stan died, I lost all interest in the smashed ambulances. The exception to both of these things was Meredith telling Dr. Hahn to shut up, because that was fantastic. And yet...at the end, when Sloan noted "You are as unkind to yourself as you are to everyone else," I realized that I loved Hahn. Conditionally, of course - there is to be no more snubbing of Cristina - but in addition to her rampant Mark hate, the fact that she holds herself to a harsh standard makes her just like me. Fantastic personality trait! Now if people would just, please, stop telegraphing the idea that she's going to end up sleeping with Mark? That would be great. Because, and this is a point of great fury with me so I must mention it regularly, IT IS POSSIBLE TO HATE PEOPLE BECAUSE YOU FIND THEM UNPLEASANT, AND NOT BECAUSE YOU SECRETLY WANT TO BANG THEM. That being said, Hahn, please to be finding better drinking buddies. An example of "better" would be "absolutely anyone in the hospital besides those two."
On the bright side, I was overjoyed that all of the patients lived, except for the one that I wanted to die. Seth Green will never be on this show again! Happy dance, happy dance! His pathetic and sniveling character here was, surprisingly, every bit as irritating as his usual overconfident and obnoxious roles, proving that it really is Seth Green I hate and not just his typical role persona.
Oh, I guess I would have been okay if the racist guy had died - I loved what Bailey did with the tattoo - but at least we finally got a decent explanation for how his "ZOMG NON-WHITE DOCTORS WILL KILL ME" attitude didn't prevent him from being amicable with his black partner. He compartmentalizes. I follow the logic. I still stood up and applauded George when he very casually, with admirably restrained viciousness, informed Racist Guy that if he'd been alone in the OR, Racist Guy would most likely be dead, because the world would be a greater place without him in it. (Golly, it's almost like they're making an indirect meta reference, but I just can't tell.)
NOW let's talk about the end. Let's talk about how ending it with dancing was STUPID, and I really want to know who directed that mirrored bit, because they FAILED. Hardcore. There is nothing in this world that is so stupid-looking as non-choreographed solo dancing; it makes me bash my head against walls in writhing embarrassment for the people involved. I cannot even begin to communicate to you how horrible that was. It undid everything I wanted to like about Cristina taking pity on her intern and bringing her home like the stray puppy she so adorably resembles. That, plus, bonding by drowning your sorrows in tequila? Me: "Well, that's healthy."
And finally, saving the best for last: Gizzie. Now, when I first saw this episode - keep in mind that I had muted the opening - my roommate was busy talking through most of this scene. I didn't really mind because I had that vague warning feeling that I probably didn't want to hear whatever they were saying, so I just nodded and listened to her, although by the end of their scene I could not help interrupting her to squeal and go "Awww! I love them when they're cute!" I legally obtained this episode just so I could watch that scene over and over.
Oh, God, they are cute. I have to take this in segments because from the first moment that George sits down next to her, my heart about explodes with love for them, and does so again when he wraps an arm around her and nestles his face against her shoulder and their faces are so close. And then, "I love you." (!) "I love you." (complete with resplendent shoulder nuzzling) THIS! This is why they work. This is why they convinced me, after all the horrible wrong of their anti-chemistry, that they were perfect for each other. Because they are friends, best friends. Because in these quiet moments, when they just stop trying so hard, they find each other.
Skipping over the next line --
Voice: Why skip?
RS: Because I'm busy focusing on his hand, which might possibly be stroking her hair, and thus go temporarily deaf for a few seconds.
George then proceeds to illustrate a rather beautiful example of why their physical chemistry didn't work. Okay, he fails to mention the parts about how their first time was *squeaky dub voice* SO HORRIBLE THAT I DO NOT RECALL IT HAPPENING */squeaky dub voice*, or how their main problem was believing that consummation was the be-all and end-all definition of love and had to be achieved as soon as possible, but he does indirectly admit that his marriage to Callie wasn't meant to last (what? that's what I heard), and makes a very astute comment about how their timing was off, such as
Okay, now we can go back to that line I skipped. "We're not going to make this work, are we?" says Izzie sadly, at which point my heart freezes and shatters. But then George gives his rational mini-speech, and finishes it off with "we're saying...maybe someday." Okay, I'm slightly mollified. If you were going to bring my underdog pairing to an end, you did at least bring it to a very gratifying and graceful conclusion, with the door wide open, and I guess I can live with that. I was tired of seeing them be awkward in bed. I'm just sad because I'm guessing that when they go back to being mere friends, all these tender moments of physical closeness will disappear along with their relationship.
Hey, just out of curiosity, anyone else think that George's phrasing there was Shonda's subtle but stubborn way of giving in to fan demand to tank Gizzie, but not admitting that she made a mistake going there in the first place?
P.S. The one Moment of Win about the dancing? See my note from the beginning of part 1:
Right there was an opportunity for Gizzie cutenes...[for example] George wryly asking, "You want to dance?" All she had to do was take him up on his offer, and they could have done stupid, silly, playful-puppy-like waltzing around the room.
Wishes do come true! And they were actually a bit more serious than stupid and silly while they waltzed without words, so it was even better than I hoped. That's a nice image to close the year on. :)
*** = oh man, Muse has grabbed that train of thought and run off with it, returning with a squirming baby plotbunny. Someday in the future...probably May, at the rate I write things...there is going to be a character sketch for Ava. I've got the first and last sentences, and a couple hundred words of brainstorming in the middle.
Survivor: China, episode 11
I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but the Survivor theme songs always fill me with an indescribable amount of glee. I have no idea why. They just do. By the end of one, I'm always smiling. And I probably think this every season, but the current one makes me smile more than all the others. I'm enchanted by the strolling panda, the screaming sound dubbed over a shot of a hissing snake, and the bewitching (in a slightly creepy way) painted faces. And the players always manage to look epic and heroic in their feature clips. I think the real reason Lost never created a credits sequence is because they knew it wouldn't look half as good as this.
Anyway. Family day! As a rule, I think I have generally been un-fond of family day. But this year's crop of family members was fantastic; each person brought me more joy than the last. Erik's mom was cute and funny, and I loved Amanda's sister on the spot - they look exactly alike, have the most adorable, instantly recognizable bond dynamic, and her hair is long, blonde, wavy and gorgeous. Todd's sister looked like she was either still in high school or just barely out of it, and was sufficiently giggly and adorable. And then just when I think my vicarious glee can't get any higher, said sister drops the "she lost the baby" bomb, and all the happy just gets sucked out of the room. FWOOM. That is the biggest downer I've ever heard in my life.
Jeff came off kind of like an asshole for immediately demanding to have the gossip repeated, like "TODD! Please BROADCAST YOUR FAMILY TRAGEDY! EVERYONE should be PRIVY TO THIS INFORMATION!" It's not like they could have avoided this by not mentioning it - I would think it's sort of natural to ask about a pregnancy, because that's different and it's therefore likely to be at the forefront of your mind, but you also expect a normal answer like "it's going great." And once asked, it's not like she could do anything except tell the truth, so she did, but it didn't really have to be repeated for the benefit of everyone in the vicinity. It's the kind of thing you just pretend not to hear. You know? Anyway.
Somehow, everyone moves past that and more family members come out. PG's dad is delightful. Courtney's dad scares me a bit, but the way she clings to him like a baby monkey and starts crying makes me like her even more than I already did. And lastly, out comes Denise's husband, who makes me go "Enh?" and fight to stop snickering about how he's the perfect complement to her low blue collar life. Which makes me feel like a horrible person, but...come ON!
Also, Sprint's product placement was the most obnoxious in-show advertising I've seen since they used Olay Ribbon moisturizer in the showers last season. I think that's what it was, anyway. It might have been Sunsilk. I only remember brightly colored bottles; see, even obnoxiousness doesn't guarantee that people will remember it!
However, the challenge itself was fairly entertaining to watch - would be hell to participate in, but I loved the bird calls between the sister (even though my roommate started laughing hysterically and/or derisively - hey, it was UNIQUE!), and then Courtney became officially Made of Win when she responded to "Courtney, trying to find her father!" with "Oh, stop it Probst!" I love people who recognize that Jeff is not an almighty God figure, and mouth off to him whenever they feel like it.
I was shocked when Denise won, though not as shocked as when she didn't take PG on the reward with her. COME ON, WOMAN. Even before PG started bitching about it on camera, I thought it seemed silly and ridiculous of her not to return last week's favor. No respect for the parent/child bond at all. Honestly, I understood her taking Todd, from the way he and his sister were clinging to each other, but out of ALL those people, Amanda would have been my last pick. I mean sure, she and her sister were they were both crying, but I somehow feel that Amanda would have been the most resilient of the bunch. Courtney looked like she was going to break apart if she had to say goodbye to her dad, the hopeful-puppy expression in Erik's eyes was damned near impossible to resist, and as previously mentioned, PG deserved a returned favor. Not that I'm complaining, really, because the sisters were the two family members I most wanted to see more of. :) They were very cute once they got back to camp and were all chilling in the lake...even though Amanda's sister ALSO suffered from butt-blur, the cause of which REALLY needs to be answered in an interview soon because surely someone would have intervened by this point if she was constantly flashing her crack?
Anyway, speaking of Todd's sister, it didn't cross my mind for even a second that the miscarried-baby story might not be true, or that it might have meant "abortion" as opposed to "miscarriage." That might have been because I was unaware of this infamous Jonny Fairplay character, who must have appeared somewhere in the years I didn't watch (remember, I saw the first 3, ditched the next 6, and returned for season 10 in Palau). I was subsequently apalled by Courtney's ostentatious mockery of it, and even now that I've had time to think it over, I am inclined to sympathize with Todd and think she was being a bit of a cold-hearted and cynical bitch.
Loved the immunity challenge - I'm a big fan of both obstacle courses and trivia, so having them follow a tangled rope to get to multiple choice trivia, requiring them to be correct in order to get the right key or have to repeat the whole course, was great. Is it bad if I was relying on some of my Age of Empires knowledge to know that the crossbow was invented in China? (not that there was any excuse for getting that one wrong, because people, barbed wire was invented to confine cattle. In the Old West. I would know this even if my friend HADN'T done her History Day project on it) And I was thankful beyond belief when PG won it. Well, nobody can say that she isn't earning her place! She's The Little Scrapper That Could. I almost want her winning streak to keep going to F3.
You know what I wasn't thankful about? DENISE BEING STUPID AND HELPING GET RID OF ERIK. Not nice. Not nice at ALL. How dare you take away my one true crush object?! Well, that settles thing. Amanda needs to sweep this season, or I'll pitch a hissy fit.