Okay, maybe *some* other music exists in my world now...I've gotten my hands on the second half of the Doctor Who soundtrack and added it to the playlist, and am pretty much in love with it, especially the "Face of Boe" and "Doomsday" themes, and the previously mentioned motif disguised in the "Lone Dalek" track. I am also frustrated with "Love Don't Roam," because the lyrics had SO MUCH POTENTIAL on paper, and then...then it burst into my ears in a horrid jazzy swing tune. The level at which I loathe jazz music is off the charts*. I am further annoyed by the fact that I'm starting to find it catchy and, dare I say, danceable. *rolls eyes and sighs in disgust*
* = Before I get hate comments for not liking jazz, understand that I have tried to like it. I have gone to countless concerts because my friends/most favorite people in band were always in jazz band, and they all adored it more than the regular one. One of my best profs ever devoted a segment of his course to jazz history because it's his area of expertise. I wanted to share their enthusiasm. This has consistently proven impossible.
And now to round off the week's reviews:
Previously on CSI: Miami: It was January, Julia Watson was unattractive and creepy as hell, The Recapist wrote the most terrible recap in site history, Kyle's absentee mommy bought his love with a Porsche, and don't forget that a year ago Eric got shot in the head and thereafter had all his problems (and possibly his crush on Calleigh) blamed on the subsequent brain injuries. None of this will be relevant to the first post-strike episode.
Also, half the internet freaked out about the fake commercial where Eric was marrying Calleigh and/or she was possibly going to get shot. My eyelashes remained unbatted.
6x14, "You May Now Kill the Bride"
I just sat and laughed through the teaser. Seriously. Five minutes straight, laughing and laughing and laughing because it was SO. INCOMPREHENSIBLY. STUPID. The dramatic and incessantly repeated shot of the bride theatrically falling to the ground? The groom yelling "NOOOOOOO!" in slow motion? Horatio strolling up the aisle, apparently listening to his own personal theme music in his head? Sometimes I feel like I need to take a shot of season two for every season sixer I watch, because I am in serious danger of becoming jaded and hating Horatio. I mean, I'm already jaded, but the actively hating Horatio part is new. Up to now it's just been disappointment and nostalgia for the old days.
Maybe even the writers realized this, because after the commercial break, Horatio seemed rather absent from the episode, and the scenes he did have were infused with life. For example, HE SPOKE TO CALLEIGH. MULTIPLE TIMES. I sort of knew this was coming from promo pics, but promo pics have lied to me before. I can't remember how long it's been since they shared a scene, but I'm pretty sure it's been well over a year. And they didn't just speak, they had a most excellent moment of working in tandem. It was probably unrealistic and cheesy to stage that whole PDA-dialing scene, but when Horatio held up the guilty suspect's ringing phone for her to see, I started giggling like a loon. This is what H/C starvation does to me.
Also: "You ever see someone you love die, Lieutenant?" My initial reaction was a violent explosion of scorn, which required me to slap the pause button and grit my teeth for a while. Cheap ploy for emotional impact, I said. This will be excruciatingly uncomfortable because Horatio has become a robot, I said. In spite of that, I found myself holding my breath in anticipation, and...PAYDIRT. Yes. "Right in front of your eyes?" "Yeah."
I nearly fell off my chair in shock when I saw/heard actual emotion in his response. I'm afraid to even discuss it on the chance that maybe I succumbed to a fit of narcolepsy and dreamed the whole thing, but I want to use words like "raw" and "vulnerable" and "pained." There was a swallow, a muscle twitch, and best of all, a softened and hollow tone of voice on the last word. That tone kills me. I can't even remember the last time he used that tone. Surely it wasn't all the way back in "Rampage," was it?
Was it just me, or was the music REALLY, OBNOXIOUSLY OSTENTATIOUS in this episode? I mean, usually when it transitions between scenes or plays over an evidence montage, it's the central focus but it still sort of blends into the scene. This felt like the equivalent of some yahoo blasting his new favorite song through amplified car speakers. Also, um, I may have to go fetch myself this "Oh snap" version of London Bridge, because it is awesome. As truly shame-faced as I am to admit this, I sort of adore that song - but I can't listen to it because I violently despise the sound of that swear word. "Snap" nicely takes care of things.
The only song that wasn't obnoxious was the utterly gorgeous and Celtic-sounding music that played over the ending. What was that?! I want! I want!
Also obnoxiously ostentatious: the women writhing all over poles. How much time, honestly, did we have to spend watching that? I feel like we usually get a shot of that every other episode, but this time it was like TPTB just couldn't tear themselves away, and only reluctantly went back to the story after several lingering camera shots. I refuse to even get into the stripper's gross attempt to dance all over Eric's lap. There was nothing redeeming about that scene at all; it was clumsily constructed with cheesy dialogue, and I'm embarrassed on Adam Rodriguez's behalf for having to appear in it.
Was highly amused by Alexx's arched eyebrows and demand to know what Eric knew about strippers/gentlemen's clubs, though. There are increasingly frequent days when I think Alexx is the only thing that keeps this show from spontaneously combusting. Not even Yelina can rescue an episode like she can.
And finally, the supposed E/C scene. Firstly, I am disappointed that it wasn't a daydream or a delusional vision of Eric's, if only because I wanted to yell at the writers some more. Secondly, why exactly did she need to wear the veil for the recreation? I was fuzzy on many things concerning the veil (holding as collateral? replacing with cheap imitation? implanting GPS chips?! --seriously, who just happens to put GPS chips in their veils?), but that one made the least sense of all. Unless, of course, you just want another reason to have Eric make googly eyes at her.
Look, I really don't care one way or the other about this could-be couple. It's way down at the end of my preferred pairings list, but since I'll ship just about any two people you can think of on this show, even occasional bouts of slashy insanity, I like when they have cute little moments. I think they could work; I do not think they are a star-crossed pair who've been building to a slow burn in the manner of Grissom and Sara. Unlike the CSI Files reviewer, I do not particularly feel like the writers need to decide on a direction for this storyline, or have Calleigh "choose" (correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't she already choose Jake? I can see that Eric's carrying a torch in one hand and readying his armor with polish in the other, but he's not currently in the ring). But it irks me that they keep *acting* as if they have a master plan for the couple when I'm pretty sure they're just winging it on a week-by-week basis.
And because I am really not bitter and twisted yet, I have to admit that Calleigh saved the scene with her cute little warning of "If you tell anyone I did this, I'll kill you" and thus gave the scene brevity instead of being a pity party. Which made me kind of enjoy it.
-HEEEEEEEEEE HEE HEE HEE little hard to hide in a white limosine with "Just Married" on it, isn't it?
-Was it just me, or was that closeup on the angel statue really, really creepy?
-I'm...not sure "sexy" day at the office is the word for it. Nauseating, perhaps. Or vulgar.
-Hm. Why does Calleigh have real diamond earrings? Present from Jake? She was clearly dying to have Ryan ask.
-Do I get credit for figuring out who the killer was as soon as they mentioned that the gun was triggered remotely? I knew there was something weird and phony about all that fumbling in the beginning.
Notes from the Fashion Show: Stoplights Without the Green
-Natalia: Her hair got floofy, and her top would have been fantastic for Valentine's day, red and with a bar hook over her cleavage. Can't decide whether to nod or roll my eyes.
-Eric: This one, however, is a definite eye roller. I mean, what was that red-checkered cowboy shirt?
-Frank: EXCELLENTLY patterned red tie. I have a new favorite.
-Ryan: Actually, the red shirt looked really good with beige jacket. Ryan hardly ever wears red; I'm surprised by how good he looks in it. Much better than in that horrid pink he's so fond of breaking out JUST TO ANNOY ME.
-All Club Strippers: Apparently required to dress in either red or yellow.
-Alexx: Two colors this woman looks really good in are yellow and purple, so you can imagine how thrilled I was when she followed up her pretty yellow shirt with the purple scrubs.
Calleigh: Working a nice white V-neck top with white pants. I'm past the point of complaining about the color (or, you know, lack thereof); I'm just going to focus on anything that looks pretty.
Medium: 4x9, "Wicked Game" pt. 1
Oh my God, that was amazing! This episode had everything. Literally, I racked my brain and could not figure out a way to improve this hour. I didn't even take any notes because I was so absorbed in the compelling story.
Admittedly, I could have done with less attempt at showing a vulnerable side of Cynthia - that was just uncomfortable; she's a cold character and I like her that way. I'm assuming her cold exterior comes from adding layers to block out the pain of losing her daughter, and I'm not begrudging her right to feel emotionally sucker-punched, but as a viewer I didn't like seeing that exterior crack. I also could have done without Joe's idiotic cartoon dream - WTF! I shielded my eyes in embarrassment for all the actors involved. But other than that...
Being kidnapped, chained, and used for sex is the height of horror for me. Living hell is worse than murder, and I think it almost beats being sold into a prostitution ring - call it a safety-in-numbers thing, or maybe a better chance at being discovered by law enforcement. At the mercy of one pyschopath, with no clues to your whereabouts, your hope is pretty much gone. Watching it through the first time, I was literally on the edge of my seat, sometimes holding my breath - Suzie's terror was that palpable. This episode actually gave me a nightmare after I watched it, so I'd say that's a hallmark of its quality. And both actresses playing the kidnapped girls seemed really familiar, but despite racking IMDB I can only come up with guest spots on Law & Order: SVU. Must have been memorable, though it probably helps that they're fairly recent.
What a twist on the ending! I never saw that coming, although I did suspect from the beginning that the blonde girl might not be dead. You lose consciousness before you die, so even though TV strangulations are always an expedited business, I thought it highly likely that the killer (or maybe that word should be in quotes) had miscalculated. And as soon as we heard that Joanne was still alive in present times, I thought that either the blonde girl had made up a fake name/identity, or more likely that she'd escaped her captor at some point, and out of fear for her life had never told anyone what happened, and maybe pretended she'd just run away for a while or something.
When Suzie escaped, I was screaming at her not to stop at the phone - calling 9-1-1 takes too long and makes noise; she knows she's in the suburbs, so in this case get out, get out, get OUT! And then Joanne was just standing there like a ghost. WHAT. I would have frozen too. (and then I saw her hands concealed behind her back, as if holding a knife, and I would have tried to shove her out of the way and keep running) And having the creepy guy come up behind Suzie, presumably to kill her for real...eeeeh. I highly doubted the poor daughter had made it out alive, but DAMN that's depressing. She came across as such a solid, (and, well, I kind of fell in love with her the minute she huffed "Mother!" in exasperation. Because that's what exactly what I do when I get impatient with my mom) I don't even know what else to say about this plot; it's the most gripping and compelling one I've ever seen on this show.
And despite what I previously said about being annoyed with Cynthia's vulnerability, I still loved her role in this episode, and her ability to go from firing Allison one minute to asking her back the next. Mostly because she manages to apologize without actually sounding apologetic, remorseful, or even sheepish while doing so. It's like she just presses a "redo" button and tries again. I love that.
Over on the family front, there were almost too many adorable scenes with the girls to count. Usually one or two of the kids get shortchanged, but these time they all had fairly solid parts. Starting with the breakfast scene - Ariel cracked me up with her snarky comment about "what if I choke from eating too fast?", but not as much as her subsequent smirking about how "Mom's magazines don't have pictures of boys in swimsuits on them." Joe's look of annoyance is priceless. Almost as good as look of panic upon snatching the magazine from Marie's curious hands. Also:
Joe: Oh, that's Sports Monthly, like it says on the cover.
Bridgette: What sport is SHE doing?
I can't help but feel a little sorry for Joe whenever Bridgette whines and complains about math or science (not unlike the twinge of guilt I always felt for despising running when my dad was a cross-country star), but she was hysterical complaining about her stupid solar energy project (side note: that seems unusually complicated for a 9-year-old's homework), and he was at the top of his Amazing Dad game in helping her figure out a more relevant way to go about her project. The subsequent frustration and yelling when they couldn't get the more relevant way to work as planned was also remniscient of some of my school projects. The curse of Medium - I'm never sure if I'm relating to the parents or the kids. On the one hand, it's great that all the characters are so well written, but on the other, as you might imagine, this occasionally throws my Joe love into serious question.
Nevertheless...oh, poor defeated Joe. Tell me he didn't break your heart with that next scene. "I feel like I let her down." For as much as Allison refuses to let him indulge in his "pity party," this long stretch of being unable to get a job, unable to really support them as head of household, has very seriously got to be wearing him down. :( On the bright side:
Dancing in the garage! Bridgette and especially Marie were too cute for words, but Joe's exaggerated smile and waving his hands to "Girls Just Want to have Fun" - *falls off chair laughing* BEST SCENE EVER.
And on the Allison/Joe front...beautifully wrought. From her affectionate pat on the butt while listening to him talk to Bridgette about her project (I have no idea why that thrills me, except it's such a married thing) to cuddling at bedtime, I couldn't have been happier. Especially the latter, with her biting and fairly unwarranted sarcasm about solar-powered devices, and him casually buffeting them off. "I still have my pity party decorations, if you want to borrow them." Awww. The fact that when her only response is to sulkily stick out her tongue, he laughs and puts his arms around her - plus, shoulder kiss - causes a squee explosion. In light of what happens at the end of this episode, his patience and indulgence here are even more noteworthy.
Because as much as I like the cuddling, I also like the fighting, because it is rare but realistic. Why, hello, Sarcastic Joe! I don't see you around very often, but you can be quite bitchy. In a completely justified way, of course. And subtle; I like that it takes Allison forever to clue in to what he's saying. And I also like that even when she does, she blows him off, like it can't possibly be serious. Poor Joe. "This marriage has always been about me supporting you." It really has, even though to be fair, Allison's dreams have never required large sums of cash to follow up on. Still, I can't blame him for stalking off when she wouldn't even entertain the notion of listening to him.
As for Joe's invention itself...if it's really worth the millions he thinks it is, then there's no way it's going to happen. The show wouldn't be nearly the same if they were millionaires now, would it? What might happen, however, is Allison agreeing to trust him and let him use the college fund money, and have him actually be somewhat successful with it, but then have money continue to be tight and instead of finding venture capitalists, he finds someone willing to buy the idea outright - one lump sum that won't last forever, but will buy them some comfortable time and breathing room.
Also, I am amazed that they have over $30k saved up for college. Seriously, 30k? I don't think we had any money saved for college, or if we did it was a very tiny sum, and I've gotten by all right so far
(well, loans that will end up bleeding me dry, but that's my own fault for choosing a private school). *pause* 30k?!?! MY MIND, IT IS BOGGLED BY THE MASSIVE SAVINGS.
Next week: At first I thought we were going to have to wait a depressingly long time for the next episode, but apparently it's just right around the corner on Monday. Yay!
Voice: AHEM! I interrupt this broadcast to demand acknowledgement of my birthday, which was yesterday and which YOU COMPLETELY FAILED TO POST ABOUT.
RS: I was busy sleeping off the week's insomnia. Would you like to talk about it now?
V: Remember the good times on that beautiful day in 2000, when you were strolling along walking the dog, thinking about Pokemon, and I spontaneously appeared in a poof of magic brain dust and started laughing about your unnatural love for Team Rocket?
V: Did you ever suspect what a long and crazy partnership we would come to have?
RS: Yes. That's why I immediately tried --
V: *wheezes with laughter* To kill me with a hammer! I know! Hahaha!
RS: See, even after five minutes, I knew you were trouble.
V: Oh, you love me. You've always loved me. Deep down.
RS: Yes. Way deep. Right underneath my adoration for Michael Scott and my desire for David Cook to win American Idol this year.
V: Well, those are fairly recent developments; are you suggesting that before that your love for me was brimming near the surface at all times?
RS: . . .
V: And haven't we had fun chatting about homework, with occasional bouts of working on it, all these years?
RS: Oh yeah, that's the word for it. "Fun."
V: Let me rephrase that - remember all those times I saved your butt on homework assignments and papers? I did it just last night, I said "How do you feel about Darfur?" and you said "I feel like after writing 4 pages about the philosophical arguments for and against intervening in it, and still not being done, I want Africa to sink into the ocean so I never have to think about it again," and I said "Excellent, that's helpful. Use that to sentiment to write the last page about which side you agree with, and try not to cuss at any point."
RS: Fine, sometimes you're sort of useful.
V: *indignantly* SORT OF useful?! I think I deserve better than that. I also think I deserve birthday presents.
RS: Do you now.
RS: How about an entire blog post?
V: This is only half a blog post. You keep butting in. In fact, it's even less than half because it's tacked onto the end of your crap. If it were an entire blog post, I would have free rein to tell everyone about how wonderful and excellent a ship Jim/Karen is, or perhaps speculate on Martha, The Greatest Companion of All Time.
RS: Definitely no free rein for you.
V: Sigh. Being a voice is tiresome when no one will let you speak.
RS: I'm letting you speak. You're babbling nonsense right now.
V: In protestation of this harsh treatment on
RS: Crap. I, um, er, apologize and look forward very much to chatting with you again tomorrow about Peter Singer's probable nonsense? And you can have the gold glitter pen I got for Easter for use in the journal?
V: I grudgingly accept both your apology and the pen. I won't even complain that it's not my usual metallic blue Gelly Roll.
RS: Well, as long as you don't complain, you're welcome.