RS (rainbowstevie) wrote,


Torchwood, 2x11, "Adrift"

I really wish there'd been a video camera trained on me just before That Scene; I imagine my reaction would have been priceless.  Let me see if I can try and recreate it for you:

Gwen enters a dark and mostly deserted Hub, calling out for Jack.  I recognized the angle looking up at the lights in the upper level, and remember thinking "huh, that looks like where the Bad Thing takes place in some episode obviously still in the future.  I should remember that for later."  There was just this vague prickle in the back of my mind that it was more important than that.  And as my brow knit, furrowed in concentration as I tried to understand the warning, SUDDENLY THERE WAS MANFLESH ALL OVER THE SCREEN.

"EW!  OH MY GOD GROSS!" came my shocked gasp, as a millisecond later my hands flew up to cover my eyes while I simultaneously jerked my chin sharply down and shut them, followed by ripping my earbuds out to get rid of the sound as well.  And then there may have been a little bit of dry heaving as I counted seconds until I felt it was probably safe to tune back in.

*still feels faintly ill*  I can't believe I wasn't more careful about avoiding that; I'd gotten all complacent with this season's lack of vulgarity and between that and getting wrapped up in the plot, all my barriers were down... *shakes head* 

And seriously, you know, I've seen that picture in like 8 billion macros/icons, and I thought I was thoroughly used to it by this point, but man.  I DID NOT ACCOUNT FOR MOVEMENT AND/OR NOISES. 
But aside from that, this episode had a fair amount going for it.  Like abandoned-looking buildings on an island in the middle of nowhere (random compounds full of crazy-ass, possibly experimental stuff!  It was like Torchwood had a wonderful baby with "Lost."), for one, and PC Andy for another.

Andy, Andy, Andy.  Where did you come from all of a sudden? I've been tolerating him in much the manner I tolerate Rhys, mostly because Spy loves him, but then out of nowhere he's the Jim to a (really really slutty trashy) version of Pam!  And wham! I fall head over heels for his adorkable earnestness and hilarity (he referred to Jack as 'Mulder' again!  I may have found the reference lacking first time around, but I love continuity). 

This feeling was followed about eight seconds later by "Screw Rhys" and "GWEN/ANDY FOREVER."  Rhys?  You're out.  Seriously.  My newfound Gwen/Andy shipping knows no bounds, because I'll be damned if the latter's not ten times cuter and more personable and really.  Three years, and he still has feelings.  Way to get to me, show!  And the reason this works for him and not Rhys as far as activiating my shipper heart, is basically because Andy is cute.  Yep.  That's like 90% of it .

Also, Gwen, for shame; you've been self-deluding your ass off all season pretending Rhys is the only one who'll put up with you.  Andy will!  Andy wants to! 

I can't help it!  They've already surpassed even the Towenship in terms of how invested I am!

In a related note, Gwen, it was really shitty (is Torchwood; can swear) to trick Andy into doing something nice for you and then ditching him on an expedition he really wanted to be part of (both for the adventure and to spend time with you, I suspect).  There aren't many times I actually want to punch you in your gap teeth, but this was definitely one of them!
So now, because my ship is in no way feasible, I'm probably just going to sulk whenever Gwen & Rhys are domestic and happy.  Like at the end, where Gwen crying and being pulled into a hug followed by snuggling against his chest and him bestowing protective kisses?  That should ping every button at the top of my Cute Meter.  And instead what I feel is "meh." 

(Or prior to that, when Rhys is completely flipping his lid?  Angry men are supposed to become more attractive to me.  He failed in this respect.  Although he did earn a thumbs up for giving Gwen a rare and well-deserved wake-up call.)

I think the idea of Gwen as a mother disturbs me, though.  She said it in all the wrong ways, but she had a point during their fight.  Do you really see right now as the ideal time for Gwen to start popping out the babies? I mean, other than giving Rhys something to distract him during her long hours away from home, I can't see how that would work well. 
Plot-wise, this was twenty types of dark and depressing and I don't really want to dwell on it.  The scream was really, reeeeeeally unsettling.

And Jack was being a much bigger Jackass than he needed to be for most of the episode.  It would have solved a lot of problems if he'd just answered all her questions from the beginning (in detail, I might add.  Like telling her about the screaming instead of saying they're 'sick in ways you can't imagine.'  Because I could imagine constant, unstoppable screaming.  Whereas 'sick' just made me think that he was exaggerating, and so I was all for bringing Jonas' mother to see him too. 

On the bright side, Ianto had a tiny moment of not torturing me with his horrible--

--digression; OH MY GOD.  IANTO IS MY TOBY.  *is wide-eyed with delight*  I never understood how one character could be so unfailingly awful at everything he did, and now I realize it's just because I have irrational hatred, so deeply ingrained I don't even remember where it began, only that I can't stand anything about him!  Now that I know this, I have no plans to be a better person than Michael Scott.  People need someone to hate.  /digression. --

--ness; the brief moment in which he was not horrible was in getting Gwen the GPS coordinates and otherwise being the only person who didn't totally ignore her or try to shut her down.  I liked that he actually reached out to her, in a sneaky and subtle way no less.  That was nice.

And now I just really, really don't want to wander into the season finale zone.  O internet, what random things can you distract me with to ensure I don't get there tonight?

Tags: torchwood, tv commentary

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