RS (rainbowstevie) wrote,


[author's note: post written as I watched the episode; emotions changed with each additional Jack/Anne scene]


Setting the scene: I am glumly watching the episode, yawning in boredom, fast-forwarding through most of story and having already decided not to watch anything beyond the mess that is this couple, because "sick and wrong" is at least more interesting than "bland storyline about missing student athlete."  But then the minute I saw her sitting on the park bench, I sat bolt upright, eyes gleaming.  "OH!  Could it - really - maybe - did she have a miscarriage?!?!" 

As soon as she uttered the words "I lost the baby," I had to punch pause and leap up off the bed, dancing around the room and doing a series of cheerleader routines and high kicks in jubilation.  Yes, my immediate reaction was celebration.  Is that cruel and coldhearted of me?  I apologize.  But remember, I have been fervently wishing to hear something like that since last May.  Fervently.  Wishing.  I *love* when wishes come true! 

Anne said the doctor said "it wasn't uncommon" given the percentages or something...??  What was that about?  Just her age?  She does seem a bit old to be carrying a baby. 

Anyway, I didn't think anything could top this revelation, so I fast-forwarded through another swath of the episode, having completely lost interest in the Missing Person by this point except possibly to find out his ultimate fate.

Screech!  Pause, back up, rewind!  They appear to be in a clinic.  An abortion clinic, by the looks of the young teenage girls sitting around the room.  Or maybe it's just a regular wing of the hospital, I don't know.  That's not important, what's important is that given the look on her face, I am - *gasp!* - beginning to feel a little bit sorry for Anne!  And glad that Jack is there with her!  I feel faint.  Okay, surely NOW the episode can't top itself.  *fast forwards again*

When Jack threw his hissy fit about wanting to know what was happening, I nearly spliced myself going "OH MAN, how much would I love this show if they killed Anne too?!"  (because, I could probably learn to love a wounded and heartbroken Jack Malone) That part was too good to be true, so it didn't happen, but that didn't matter because the next J/A scene was wickedly magnificient. 

Despite my momentary renewed interest in the death wish, I was feeling particularly benevolent towards the pair as long as the baby was gone, so I had made up my mind to like this scene all on its own merit.  Because I am, of course, all about tenderness in the face of illness/injury.  However, halfway through it, I noticed that Anne's voice?  Is remarkably like Marisol's.  (at least it does right now, when she's tired and worn out and tearful)


Which caused me indescribable amounts of glee. 

I then, of course, had to watch listen to the scene another three times, pausing every few seconds to absorb the squeefulness of it all and keep the dreamplay images rolling across my brain.  Oh, hee.  Oh how wonderful.  Add this to the fact that Jack's voice is a baritone of its own, and the usage of "sweetheart," and it was like every tragic daydream I'd ever had about the hypothetical Caine baby came true.  The scene was a full ninety seconds long, and at the end of it I still went "Noo!  Keep going!"

How crazy is it that after three months of weekly pleading with Law and Order, it's stupid Without a Trace that (figuratively speaking) gives me Marisol again?

Okay, okay, back to judging the scene on its own merit.  I loved it.  I adored it.  I want to save this episode just for the Jack/Anne clips.  It was cliche and included all the standard things you'd expect, with the woman breaking down in tears, apologizing and blaming herself, and the standard helpless guy reaction, automatically insisting it wasn't her fault, there was nothing she could have done...and yet I loved it anyway.  Did I mention there was Sweetheart?  That is my favorite pet name of all time.  I love that at the end, she is predictably going "I really wanted this," and Jack somewhat automatically says "Me too," but then he does this hilarious sort of double take, like he's just surprised himself.  And then he realizes, he really *did* want this.  When he repeats it, there is a good deal more conviction, plus some actual sadness, in his voice.   

Which was perfect, because I think half the reason I hated this whole baby storyline was that it was this big stupid ACCIDENT.  Jack always seemed like he'd give almost anything to go back in time and prevent this from happening.  He always seemed reluctant, reserved, like on the one hand he wanted to be with Anne, and make her happy, but on the other he felt like he was already a father, had raised two kids (half-raised, anyway), and didn't want to dive back into it all over again. 

That double-take/repetition finally sold me.  Jack finally realized how he actually felt.  In the same breath, he not only realized that he had been somewhat dreading this, but also that after it had been taken away, he felt a real sense of loss.  I don't know how else to explain, but I am finally satisfied with something in this train wreck romance. 

Mood: speechless

Me: "Wha - quoi - guh...*pause, channels Homer Simpson* 'muh - wuh - fuh...SUH'?!  What the hell is this?!  Is that Anne getting in a taxi, LEAVING him?"

I was fully expecting some kind of quiet end scene with her asleep in bed, and Jack beside her, a forehead kiss or something similarly loving and protective. That's not quite what I got.  What the fudding fudge?  They're broken up now?  When?! Why? What the hell changed between the recovery scene and now?  They can't get past this?   I *JUST* JUMPED ON YOUR BLOODY SHIP, AND NOW IT'S SINKING?!  Seriously.  I was on the ship!  You know how I know?  I watched the whole memory scene with them snuggled up talking about their fortune, and I thought, or at least was willing to think, it was cute.

Bloody garbage show.  Can't do anything right.  *GRUMP*
Tags: without a trace

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