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I shouldn't have done that.

Deliberately put myself to bed at 5:15 so I would sleep through The Office.  Ordered self not to watch it until tomorrow afternoon.  Planned to put it on the Sansa for this purpose.  Made mistake of fetching it early, thinking to get that part out of the way.  Lasted until 10:17 PM before cracking, caving, and watching it.  Neeeeeeeeded Halpert Family Scenes.

End result: I couldn't concentrate on anything beyond said scenes, and was prone to skipping and fast-forwarding, yet was overwhelmed by the general AWESOMENESS of everything and frustrated that I couldn't care about anything else in the face of Jim & Pam being in the same physical space.

 Also, torn between annoyance at lack of Cute Moments and taking shallow, fluttery breaths over the hotness that is Angry!Defensive!Jim getting increasingly agitated and steadily more threatening in the face of incessant attacks on his fiancee.  Am dealing with it, during time I should really be studying, by concocting missing scenes. 

Because, come on, there's no way Pam goes from being that upset at the table, to smiling and happy by the time they leave, without the release of a couple overwhelmed tears and reassurance from Jim somewhere in there.  Someone desperately needs to get this fic on the internet before I do it, because I'm pretty sure that while my scenario is workable, my dialogue would faaaaaail, and nothing pains me more than bad fic!Jim/Pam dialogue.

DAMN IT, SHOW.  I NEED TO BE STUDYING, NOT FIGURING OUT HOW I CAN MAKE THE CORNER BY THE RESTROOMS SEEM LIKE A NICE PLACE FOR A HUG. 
 
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EDIT: And now somehow my essay about "the greatest barriers to financial stability for dual-income families with young children" (I quote from the assignment sheet) has turned into...me reading angsty, angsty, tear-inducing angst stories about the future Mr. & Mrs. Halpert.  I've covered cancer, death, miscarriages & infant death so far, to name a few.  Emotionally torturing myself is apparently a new hobby of mine.

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