This handy little device shows you which Xanga users have visited your site, if logged in, or the state/country if not attached to a specific ID. More importantly, as I understand it, it shows you which page they clicked on to get to your site/one of your entries. What's really fun about this are the visitors from Google results, so that you can see what they searched for. And since I continue to cross-post all my TV entries over there, I get some fun stuff. Let me show you some of my all-time favorites (note: most statements not originally put in quotes):
"CSI Miami" + "stupid Yelina"
"poor Rebecca Nevins" + dumped
"Why does CSI season 8 suck"
"use the word lame"
jim pam squee
ncis + episode review + squee
"what is the song that is played at the end of ER when ray gets" (exceeded your search limit, there?)
But the #1 popular search result of ALL TIME is whether or not "A Season for Peaches" is a real novel. That episode of The O.C. aired over two years ago, and still not a week goes by that the same damn keywords don't pop up in my footprints. I finally tacked up a big boldface notice at the top of the page, just to answer that question more quickly.
I might have to go edit my post about "Time Crash," though, because you would not believe how many people hit it up for the kettle-and-some-string quote. It's beginning to give Season for Peaches a serious run for its money. And I require entertainment from my footprints, darn it!
...I've been hanging onto this post for a while. Possibly a year. It seemed important to finally remember to post the damn thing. It was kind of interesting, yes? No? Let's move on to the other courses.
Cold Case, 6x17, "Officer Down"
So I think I might be speechless.
Wow. Just wow. I figured it was going to be a pretty good episode, but the masterful way they made it all about the current case (Jeffries' shooting) while living up to the title by incorporating flashbacks and old references from past episodes? WIN. And not only was the case a fascinating, twisty road, but the emotional involvement from all the detectives was off the charts. There was not one wasted second. I think I'm reduced to bullet points in no particular order:
-The way we saw everyone drop what they were doing to rush to the scene, especially Kat hustling her daughter out of bed to go to Grandma's. Any day we see Little Miss Miller is a good day.
-Bemusing snarking in the car about finishing off the last 1/2 gallon of milk.
-Everything in Vera's immediate reaction to hearing the shots and rushing in. Amazing acting.
-Prayers in the chapel, preferably the quiet kinid as opposed to when Vera was threatening to bust a guy's face open for shushing him. And I really like the way Kat quailed when she found them in there, assuming the worst.
-Excellent callbacks to Lily's shooting! It wasn't so long ago, after all, and watching her sink to the ground in the privacy of the interrogation room, overwhelmed and crying, was pretty powerful
-I lied - Cooper was wasted screen time. Necessary, I suppose, but unwelcome all the same.
-BOONE CALLBACKS. Also, I know it's a crime show requisite to have the boss butt heads with bureaucrats at some point, but really? This random guy suddenly doesn't like the way Stillman runs things? Because as far as rule-bending, bullheaded bosses go, he's relatively innocuous. Philly's so cute, all innocent and unaware of people like Horatio Caine and Jack Malone.
-SHARIF ATKINS!! As the tragically upset boy who shoots his rival in revenge, only to find out he shot the wrong guy in his blind/deaf rage.
-Such a cool story about Jeffries' past, going from shiftless shoplifter to honest wage-worker and launching the rest of his successful life. I always think the man is one of the more boring characters, but he always comes out with the richest backstory.
-So, Pops is pretty much the coolest old guy ever. He's like the elderly, inner-city version of the Doctor. No fear, total confidence, counteracting violence with words alone - and succeeding. I'm gobsmacked that he actually managed to shame a bad-ass gang member into pushing a broom for minimum wage just by opening his eyes to the fact that otherwise he'll be in jail/dead before he's 25.
-Pity about that crazy 13-year-old brother or whatever he was. Stupid children. So proud of Lily when she stormed in to corner him with gun drawn, all "give me a reason."
-Hey there, random appearance of Frankie! I almost went back to loving her, if only because I felt sorry for her having to endure Scotty's bitterness. Then I remembered how she earned it. Still didn't stop me from thinking it was cute that she actually baked the tape with a hairdryer to restore it, though.
-Bottom line: best episode of the year.-
-Lost, 5x09, "Namaste"
-Wait, why isn't Sun getting sucked through time with the rest of the gang? This makes no sense! Unless it's just more of the Island's epic "Screw over Sun for getting away with delivering a healthy baby" revenge. Which seems like as good a theory as any, if you ask me. Or maybe it has something to do with being in Widmore. Blaming Widmore works for me too.
-Daniel has vanished somewhere, I guess? I am not ashamed to admit that I failed to notice his absence until people pointed it out online.
-Jin's English is awesome!
-Team Ben/Sun forever! Or, you know, the five minutes it lasted. Man, Lost is like a Choose Your Own Adventure book; you can only guess at what the best course of action will be. For example, what would you do right now?
A) Go back to the beach with Lapidus to lead the group of survivors/wait for rescue
B) Trust what Ben says and go with him to the main island
*pause* Or secret option C) Take Ben out, then convince Lapidus to come to the main island with you.
I personally would have gone with B before the secret option appeared, but I guess this way works? I dunno. Being alone with Ben is scary, but after she got Frank to come with, I'm thinking you don't want to let Ben sneak around being nefarious out of your sight. Then again, I could be totally wrong. I died a lot in the Choose Your Own Adventure books.
-I am having a ton of fun watching Sayid try to keep up with what Sawyer's making up on the fly. Mostly I'm just falling in love with Sayid all over again - this cycle happens a lot, as I forget about him when he's not dominating the screen and then am suddenly hit over the head with why he started off as my favorite character. And it is quite interesting to watch him and Sawyer in roles that have taken a 180 degree turn.
-Aw, I feel really bad for Jack and his look of disbelief upon being instantly demoted from surgeon to janitor. He doesn't deserve that, come on.
-"When are you and Jim going to have one of these?"
Me: SULIET BABIES, YES PLZ LET'S TALK ABOUT THOSE. (And that was how I knew that my shippy alliances were truly beginning to turn)
-I miss Hot Bearded Sawyer more than I ever thought possible. This new one still looks sad and shorn. On the bright side, Jack's hair. Yow. *purrs* (this show is so totally going to make me ship Jate again, isn't it? God.)
-Young Ben is so awesomely creepy! I forgot about that. Also, my brain is a sieve, but does what's happening now match up in any way with why Ben had certain people on "the list"?
-And the mysterious baby boy is...drumroll please...ETHAN! I don't think any of us were expecting that. I'm all for smothering the infant immediately, personally. I haven't forgiven him for trying to hang Charlie.
-Dude, Sawyer is making Nostradamus references. I don't even know how to make a Nostradamus reference. *looks stuff up*
-HOLY **** CHRISTIAN SHEPHERD IS CREEPY. Everything involving the creepy walk to the abandoned buildings was some of the most frightening stuff I've ever seen on Lost. Quality horror film stuff, that.
Love Shapes With Lines And Edges
OK, so the first thing you should know is that dollsome wrote me - well, not me personally; just wrote in general - an excellent fic patch for last week that brought me like 90% closer to shipping Suliet with my whole heart, as opposed to pining dramatically for Skate. (which kind of sucks, because I had like five different lyrics from Dido songs that I was planning to use as titles for posts containing Lost episodes, my favorite one being "I will go down with this ship")
With that in mind, I am pretty sure my heart physically cracked open and poured out tears for the stricken look that flashes across Juliet's face when she hears that everyone (a word which mostly means "Jack and Kate," I think) is back. Much as I want to see the inevitable tension flare between her and James over this fact, a large part of me wants it to be because they make false assumptions about each other, assuming the worst, and then it turns out that their fears are completely unfounded. SHUT UP THIS COULD STILL HAVE A HAPPY ENDING.
Another, more devious part of me thinks it would be super-hilarious if Jack and Sawyer started getting territorial over Juliet this time, while Kate just got totally ignored in the background. THAT'S WHAT I WOULD DO. (I was maybe a little more moved than I expected to be when Jack saw Juliet again for the first time and tried to wrap his head around the fact that she and Sawyer were living together)
Mostly I'm just feeling kind of sick and not in the mood to deal with Kate & Sawyer's crap anymore, which is a shocking and sudden turn of events. I reserve the right to flip-flop on this issue, but what worries me is that right now, I'm imagining the scenario of Juliet dying - which tends to be the only way I can mentally change one partner in an OTP - and it's not working. If Juliet dies, I will not be satisfied with Kate providing comfort. I will just become a wreck of grief. DO NOT WANT.
Dear show: please do that magic thing you do with tricking me into following your whims. ASAP. Tell me how to feel and I'll do it!
I feel like next week might involve a whole lotta death. Or at least one of the promised deaths. I'm trying not to think about it.
The Office: 5x18, "New Boss"
Hey everybody, did you know that Michael's been at Dunder-Mifflin for 15 years? FIFTEEN! This is his 15th anniversary! 15th! Fifteen years! I just wanted to make sure we were all aware of this fact, because the episode was really subtle about it and hardly mentioned it at all.
Nosediving from last week, this episode was not amazing at all. It was merely layer upon layer of uncomfortable. To quote my own spot-on predictions: I'm just going to ignore that ball of knives in my stomach that tells me there's going to be the bad kind of conflict between Jim and the new VP. (Ryan v. Jim was fun conflict. This, I fear, is going to be like David Wallace and Michael style conflict, and Jim is not the David Wallace in this situation.)
Things That Were Good
* The cold open, with Jim standing around in a tux and casually undermining Dwight by saying the word "classy" a lot, and occasionally upping the ante by throwing around French words for "not classy"
* Pam's unholy glee and delight in observing Jim look ridiculous (joint TH for the win! "It took him 40 minutes to get ready this morning"), including the bit where she lets him stutter and ramble just long enough before quietly leading him away from Charles where he can do no further damage to himself. At least for the next five minutes.
* Angela and Kelly both kissing up to Charles. KELLY GOT SCREEN TIME THIS WEEK, YOU GUYS. AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, THAT'S LIKE BEING THROWN A PARTY.
* Andy's screen time was extremely minimal this week. I barely even remember seeing him.
* I kinda like Charles Minor so far! (Edit: More and more with every negative review I read!) He's like what Jan aspired to be, before she went all crazy and kissed Michael - a consummate professional tasked with the impossible task of holding Michael to adult standards despite the latter's insistence on acting like a small child. I find his no-nonsense attitude and willingness to verbally beat Michael with a stick extremely refreshing.
Things That Were Awful
Basically everything else, including but not limited to:
-Jim's slicked-back hair, which it turns out I cannot deal with even for the purposes of pranking Dwight. *shudders*
-excruciating amounts of screen time for Michael, with whom I am not sympathizing at all this week
-the even more excruciating fact that for as awesome as Charles is, his opinion of Jim is about on par with my opinion of Andy, which is the one drawback to me liking his character. He's probably got an evil eye on Pam now too, by PPC association. This sucks.
-Phyllis, you are officially a goddamn bitch. I'm sorry you lost control of the Party Planning Committee, but that's no reason to take your wrath out on the innocent new Committee, especially when Jim and Pam make up 50% of it.
-On second thought, the more people talk about how they love seeing Angela's
-I literally spent 2/3 of this episode just curled up in a ball, cringing horribly. Mostly at Jim. When Jim's lines pain me as much as Michael's, we are in a world of hurt.
- I AM NOT OKAY WITH CANON CONFIRMATION THAT OSCAR AND GIL HAVE BROKEN UP. I had mastered living the world of perfect denial up to this point!
OK, so I almost never find the TV Squad reviews useful for anything - I almost always disagree with them - but this week, I positively love this quip: "Second, the act of watching Jim in a tuxedo for a half hour actually increased my wife's fertility levels 9000%. I sneezed during the show and I'm pretty sure she's pregnant now."
Still: Fifth worst of the season, and it's only that high because Charles > Holly and/or Jan and Jim in a tux > Pam at art school, which means it can't be ranked lower than Business Ethics and Baby Shower. Although I reserve the right to change my mind before Official Ranking Time in June.
Look, watching Jim get humiliated is really not my idea of a good time.
Edit: *reads more negative reviews* I think I need to make it a little bit clearer that my negative feelings toward this episode were all because of Michael's actions/reactions, not the new character himself. I LOVE CHARLES MINOR. HE IS EXACTLY WHAT THIS SHOW NEEDS. Go play in traffic, Michael Scott.
ER, 15x20, "Shifting Equilibrium
It's probably just me, but I think Neela's goodbye fell kind of flat. (Never mind how I still haven't quite processed the fact that she's really left)
I'm not sure what I was expecting, but I did not need to watch her spend another half an episode having Deep Conversations with Simon at an airport bar. God! I thought we were done with this crap! I know it was just a sort of cleansing conversation and meant to tie up loose ends or something, but I didn't like it. What a waste of my time; it leaves a sour taste on my tongue to have him be the foundation of her capstone farewell. Talk about disappointing! I'd much rather have seen Neela hanging around the goodbye party. Her years here have been about so much more than him; it feels like stole her last scenes. At least some of them.
There were some very nice things to this episode, I admit. The brief flashback clips showing significant moments in her history were a really good touch; kudos to whoever put that in. Beautiful direction (bonus: when Dubenko had delightful curly hair!). I got a little misty-eyed when Haleh led her back to the Secret Wall O' Magnetic Nameplates, especially when they zoomed in on Gallant's (I also realized that I've never actually seen Maggie Doyle in action. I should remedy that someday).
I also SKIPPED AND FLAILED WITH GREAT JOY at Dubenko's goodbye hug in the beginning, when I was still dizzy and trying to figure out the timeline we were being shown. Oh my God, oh my God, that hug. I - it - words cannot do justice! Need screencaps!
"Lucien...I don't know if I I can do this without you."
"Of course you can. You'll see...you'll see."
Tears! Wibbly voice! Hair kiss! Hand cradling head!! Oh, man, if I learned anything from Woefully Pining Barney...
"Now go. Get out of here. Please...go. Please."
LOOK HOW SAD THIS IS. PERHAPS WE COULD HAVE ONE MORE PICTURE TO ILLUSTRATE?
*passes over some crucial things; we'll come back to them later*
So then we get to the end of the episode, and it's all "Time to end up with Ray now, right?", which I had made my peace with. This was always the best way for it to end, the only fair way for all the mistreated shippers, and even though I felt like I'd been kicked in the gut last week when I saw the promo and it hit me full force that Neela was really leaving County, I know this is best for her. Right? I read over my thoughts on his appearance last fall to prepare myself until I was good and ready to pick up where they left off.
We finally see Ray. He's all husky with emotion and "Finally" and "Are you really here?" and I don't care a whit because HIS HAIR HAS BEEN BUZZED OFF, AND MY TREMULOUS HOLD ON TOLERATING HIM INSTANTLY SNAPS LIKE AN OVER-TIGHTENED GUITAR STRING.
Oh, no. Hell no. Do not want. That's it, Ray; the one thing you had going for you was your fluffy new hair, and now that it's gone, I'm freed enough from your spell to remember that I can't stand you. YOUNG LADY, GET YOUR ASS ON A PLANE BACK TO COUNTY THIS INSTANT. I'm Taking A Stand: I am not down with Ray/Neela - y'all can just be the Tragic Ship Of What If, like Greg & Sara on CSI - and I want Neela/Dubenko right now and forevermore.
She's his protégée! Little Neela! He's never been able to sort out exactly what his complex and complicated feelings toward her are, but regardless of the specifics, he clearly adores her and needs her around. I spent a good deal of the episode whimpering in pain as he vented frustration by lashing out at her, passive-aggressively or just plain aggressively. Plus, watching him promise that there will always be a job for her here no matter what positively kills me. Damn, I hate being on the Tragic Ship of What If when I don't like the alternatives.
Stupid Ray and his stupid buzzcut. I don't have enough incentive to blur/close my eyes and pretend he still looks good.
As for the bit I skipped - hooray for Abby! (boo for surprise-spoiling promos) I'm so glad that phone call was there to wash the memory of Simon away. Because at the end of the day, if there are two people you want to represent Neela's half-a-decade in Chicago, one of them's Ray but the other is Abby. And it made me happy that Neela needed those last (wisecracking) reassurances that she was doing the right thing. I needed to hear them too.
Plus, I cannot lie, there is a part of me just cracking up at Abby becoming Playdate Mom, managing a whole troupe of little kids running around her living room and otherwise being domestic city. Even if she's doing so under protest. ;) "Thursdays are shared childcare days. I hate Thursdays."
And then some other stuff happened. With patients. And Frank being sorta legitimately amusing in his attempt to remedy all his past offenses with things like a Ghandi-face pinata (LOL). It's all kind of a blur right now. Oh! I guess I will deign to mention Morris and Julia's spat about him wanting to her to choose a less dangerous job, which - yes, Archie, that's sexist. I'm just glad you finally realized that and made up for it by wearing donkey ears and baking an apology pie with an imaginary apron on. *is amused*
Umm...think that's it. Can I go back to staring longingly at the (original, full-size) screencaps on my computer now? I desperately wanted to break out the Dubenko/Neela icon I found and have been storing up for months on end for this post, but then Abby's appearance made me stick with the Luby Love one, and it's rather wasteful to have two icons for a show that's almost over and which I'm probably never going to talk about again. Just, you know, this is kinda my happy place:
Note To Self, Things I Am Still Missing: HIMYM, SLAT, NCIS, SVU, WaT, NY, GA, PP (x2), Bones, & last week's CSI. (I've always been kind of entertained by the fact that I can abbreviate almost every show whose title isn't already an abbreviation)