"Fans will learn Jesse was murdered."
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, BURN. Also: hooray! Thus ensuring he can never come back, ever, ever. It's almost disgusting how hard they're trying to woo me back full time. But I'm considering the offer. If I wind up with sufficient time on my hands, maybe I will watch along. No promises on reviews, but I might watch on a weekly basis again if it requires this little commitment. Depends how batty the remaining two newbies drive me.
Speaking of innocuous fates, the old-news mention that Stella is headed to run a lab in New Orleans made me equal parts relieved and just bittersweetly sad. I think of her as so inextricably linked to New York that it's hard to imagine her pulling up roots and heading so far away. Personally I was hoping for a department transfer or retiring to the private sector, maybe teaching. At least they didn't kill her? That didn't even cross my mind as a possibility, so it would have been really cruel.
Still hating the idea of Sela Ward.
A trip in the short-term Wayback Machine for
CSI: Miami, 8x20, "Backfire"
First, must examine irony of review for CSI: NY, 6x09:
Calliope was totally a ghost.
YEAH, WAS NOT READY TO BE TESTED ON THAT FRONT. I was so horrified/hysterically entertained by the idea of Miami writing in an actual ghost that I had to spoil myself on Wikipedia beforehand just to make sure this could not be what it really damn looked like. Wiki assured me that this wasn't real; Calleigh had simply landed herself unconscious in the hospital. Phew!
And then the episode's like, "oh yeah, by the way, Calleigh actually is hanging around in limbo between life and death. Kinda having an out-of-body experience. So that ghost? Real after all." At which point everything gets very nebulous in a way that implies you should assume this is all still in her head as part of her coma dreams, but I am so tickled by the way they have chosen to tap-dance upon and blur the line of reality that guess what, I'm taking it the ghost way. Those aren't normal drafts, Walter! Ah, why are Allison DuBois and Melinda Gordon so far away?
My other favorite part is Ryan running in to save Calleigh's ass from a burning house, again, because apparently nearly dying isn't a sufficient deterrent from repeating past mistakes (okay, so technically Ryan got the kid and the female officer, who in turn had to be saved by Super H, saved her.
In other news, this teaser spontaneously caused me to start shipping them again. This is inconvenient, but so true. Not least because Ryan has slimmed down nicely from the beginning of the season, where he appeared to have swallowed a giant marshmallow. Approaching season 3 levels of nice-looking. Might have used the word "foxy."
Anyway, have spent inordinate amounts of time rewinding the parts with him hovering around her post-house-escape. Also, while I was watching it I kept trying to pick out quotes that I thought might have actually been spoken bedside and filtered through while unconscious; one of them was "Calleigh, Calleigh, Calleigh. Always gotta be the hero." I added a platonic handhold to suit my purposes.
Of course, Smoke Gets In Your CSIs was the catalyst to kick off Eric/Calleigh, so I'm always happy to repeat another hospital visit. Eric's not the only one who can get himself hospitalized with the same injury twice! Let's see, the initial run in, the
And then I get the end. Where I'm pretty sure, and the internet confirms, I just heard "Babe, work will still be here tomorrow." Also all of the supportive hugging, which, SQUEE! (I knew I had one of those hiding somewhere for the season) Surprise collage style!
Yeah, this is my holy grail of shipping. Hospitals & their resolutions. That was my favorite thing about Mulder and Scully, you could always count on them for at least a couple of these a year.
+ This is the second time the CSI-verse has used "This Woman's Work" to accentuate dramatic injury effect. I hate that it is so blatantly about childbirth, because when you use clips for other contexts, it's absolutely beautiful.
+ The staircase was really pretty and old-fashioned, but I couldn't stop thinking how much the set of the burning house looked like a set. I could all but see where the walls ended. Which is a weird experience, as generally I think even green screen things look real.
+ Jesse has an interesting definition of "looking terrible," given that Calleigh was perfectly clean and unmarred other than the tube down her throat. All things considered, she looked pretty calm and peaceful.
+ The crazy electrocuting
Conclusion: Best of season, bar none. Out of Time & Time Bomb are fighting for silver and bronze, with honorable mentions for All Fall Down and In The Wind. Otherwise, I feel quite confident that, despite the many sucky seasons they have had since "Rio," this wins for Suckiest Of All.
+A quick note on Meltdown: damn, Jake, hotter every time I see you. Stop that. I can't simultaneously triple-book Calleigh ships; two is my limit!
Leftover feelings about Time Bomb:
+ I am shipping Ryan/Calleigh really, really hard. To a frightening degree, but I can't stop. Between the anger and the despair standing next to her at his apartment made me wish so very much that they were the ones talking about trust issues and going home together at the end of the day. Ryan has gone through a lot of crap, and only some of it has been his fault. I would like him to have someone to talk to and confide in. Guess it's time to drag out the old fic binder for a read.
+ Actually, every single one of Ryan's scenes was amazing. Especially the close talking at Rick. And for as much as the ending destroyed me, was almost worth it to savor Ryan's hotly low-voiced and threatening "You tried to pin this all on me? You're going to prison, you son of a bitch."
+ Lord Google tells me the heavy, moody instrumental music at the end of this episode is Jeff Cardoni and the incorrectly spelled "Delco and the Defense," from its use in 8x11 where I apparently didn't notice it. Oh, and turns out he has a lot of this really pretty incidental music, wow, how have I not noticed it before now? At least, I assume he does; Google has a link to one of his music pages full of similar titles that I can't seem to copy and which freezes Firefox every time I try to visit. Will check later.
+ They were a bunch of whiny (and in Natalia's case, ultra hypocritical) bitches toward Eric's covert intelligence gathering, weren't they? Seriously, overreaction. Calleigh is maybe allowed to be angry with him for keeping secrets; the others have very little recourse considering nothing bad happened to them. No, not even you, Walter.
As for the finale, let me just say WOW. While "All Fall Down" worked so much better as the theme of Wintertime's chilling Vegas story - surely you remember its legend; I was so impressed I printed it out and was 75% of the way through binding it to turn into a book before I got sidetracked and then forgot how - the theme is nice and creepy any time you can get children's voices singing it with an echoing effect. I'm also really loving the mildly sociopathic blonde psychology professor, and think this might be the most well-written plot they had all season.
I do love how somehow, even after Time Bomb provided the perfect "finale" sense and I really should have stopped there, I still did not apply the lesson I've been telling myself over and over, save the finales for September. DAMN YOU, CLIFFHANGER. At least I have spoilers to take the edge off (they really do do a remarkable job at that). And in the meantime I can just savor Eric cradling Calleigh in his arms and freaking out over her life for the second time in about a month. No, it does not get old.
P.S. Totally unrelated, but let it be known that the Furminator DOES work. It is the most amazing thing ever produced for long/thick-coated pets prone to heavy year-round shedding. I honestly cannot find a single dissenting voice from anyone who's used it properly, but I figured I'd add to the angel choir of praise anyway.