Stabbin' folks with my Ghostface knife

I checked out Scream 3 from the library, figuring it'd be a fun rewatch since Scream 2 was such a rousing good time, and discovered...I do not think I have seen this one!  It seems impossible that I would have missed it, but not one single thing from it ever seemed familiar. Which made it even more fun when they introduced the newest detective on the case, and I was completely disengaged until HOLY FUDGE WAS THAT PATRICK DEMPSEY? YES! (insert flailing here) Of course, I quickly realized the drawback to that: "Great. Either he's the killer, or I'm going to have to deal with him getting killed."

Oh wait, unless there is SECRET OPTION THREE, a/k/a my personal dream option: he gets knocked around a bit but ultimately survives against all odds, and then I get to believe in a world where he and Sydney go off and have fun dating for a while. Woohoo! 

That definitely makes up for the part where Liev Schreiber, one of my favorite roles in preceding films, gets knifed about five minutes in.

[Me: ...UNFAIR. D: ]

Also, I was barely over my initial PD flailing when "HOLY CRIPES, SCOTT FOLEY TOO??" That...ended a little worse, as he was the killer and I had to deal with him getting killed. Twice, technically. Which is a fair trade for getting to keep Dt. Kincaid, but still. 

By the time I finished, all I could do was stare at the screen in awe and declare this the best horror franchise in the history of horror franchises for not only delivering a gorefest, but doing it with a slew of fantastic actors and coming up with clever, interesting explanations at the end -- no matter how hard I try, I never even have an inkling who it will be. Glued to the screen throughout, there was nothing I did not love about this one* except the annoyingly excessive amount of swearing. No, hey, I realize you're literally running for your lives, but this is like five times worse than an average R-rated movie and it quickly grates on the ears. 

(*that, and Courtney Cox's "bangs." Wow. That was super unfortunate.)

Anyway. The bottom line is that I love these films and cannot believe I am currently turning down a chance to see one in theaters. Is it still in theaters? It isn't, is it? Or definitely won't still be by June 6th, the next time I will be back at the job whose commute takes me right past the cheapest-ticket movie theater. Why did I not realize how much I loved these movies earlier? Boo.

And now I'm afraid to go to bed because Ghostface killers might jump out of my closet or pop up outside my window when I least expect it.