Really, I was going to try and watch Friday Night Lights this week, what with the lack of Bones and my newly revived crush on Kyle Chandler, but I've got ultra-limited tape space (a word here which means "reserved for Lost/CSI: NY tonight"), and it's more fun to sit downstairs with Mom and watch singers perform than check out a show I've never seen before. Especially when I'm constantly afraid that every week will be my last chance to see "my A-girls" perform.
So here's where I stand: Every week, my hatred of Melinda and Lakisha grows more intense. "Big voices" suck. I hate jazz. I hate soul. I hate the fact that these two women are going to get a free ride almost straight to the top just because Simon likes them, and everybody listens to him whether they admit it or not. When you move this show to the radio, then it can be about the big fantastic voices. As long as this show is still on TV, I WANT TO SEE PRETTY PEOPLE, DAMN IT! We've established that everybody in the top 24 can sing decently, so now it's about who is most fun to look at while they sing.
I adore Antonella, because she seems so normal, like any girl I go to college with. I did not love her outfit tonight, because whoever designed the minidress is an idiot. It's not a hot fashion trend, it looks like you went to bed in an oversized shirt and then forgot to put on pants in the morning. But I loved her big gold-leaf earrings, and she's got a gorgeous face. I've got it now, she reminds me of Cindy Crawford. I don't remember what song she sang, but I didn't really think she sang it that badly; I was as mesmerized as I always am. She nailed the high note! I mean, I couldn't tell, but I hoped she did, and Mom said yes. (My eyes shot to Mom, nervous: "Did she hit that?!" Mom: "Yes...but the rest of the time she's been wavering." Me: "Blargh...")
My other A-girl, Alaina, was dressed in a gorgeous sparkly-topped blue dress, but she did not sing very well tonight either - "Not Ready to Make Nice" is a powerful song. You have to be mad when you sing it. You've gotta throw your heart into it, and she was much too quiet and laid back. That being said, of course I'm still voting for her, because she's pretty. And sweet. And because I like her, she's probably going home this week because nobody ever agrees with me.
I cycle back and forth on whether or not I love Gina, but I have to vote for her this week because even with her carnie vibes and ratty striped hair, she sang a fantastic song that I'd never heard before but must look up and obtain immediately. Oh, and my #3 girl, Jordin, is still rocking it up. You sing "Reflection" from Mulan, I'm predisposed to love you. I don't understand why everybody keeps going "You're only 17!", though, like it's this big obstacle she's had to overcome. Last I checked, wasn't 16-17 the prime age to break out as a pop artist? Which is what this show used to be about? Grumble. Anyway, all the other girls...meh.
Final note: what was up with all the dedicating songs to one's little brothers?! Pleh! I do not understand sibling bonds AT ALL. At what point is a little brother supposed to cease being annoying? Because my mom keeps saying that someday I'll be grateful I'm not an only child, but he's about to turn 15 and I still see him as a pest whom I'd like to make vanish with a flick of a wand...
Lost: Tricia Tanaka Is Dead
This show always has the most interesting episode titles, it really does. Pity it's also plagued with those boring flashbacks, with the result that I only ever watch about 25 minutes' worth of episode each week. And yet somehow, I still find enough discussion material to fill a full-fledged review.
Highlight Number 1: VINCENT THE DOG! Man, even Sawyer isn't as awesome as that dog. But he's also the worst-trained pup in the world, and only seems to be getting wilder, since nobody cares enough to pay attention to him. Which I totally don't get, given that he is THE ONLY DOMESTIC CREATURE ON THE ISLAND; especially with his real owners gone, I would think there would be fights over who got to take care of him. Pets provide a phenomenal amount of comfort. I realize they're all busy finding new love interests, but come on, I'd be so much quicker to befriend a dog than fall in love. The dog doesn't pick fights with you. Speaking of picking fights...
Hey! Skate! What in the world are you arguing about now? Kate's apparently forgiven Sawyer for everything but still wants to hear him apologize. "You know, all you have to do is say 'I'm sorry,' and we can start over again." Even though I don't think she really has any place to be ordering apologies, I liked the hope in her eyes. Clearly she thought it wasn't much to ask. And it probably wouldn't be, except this is Sawyer, who's got the longest streak of pride on the island and ain't gonna concede ANYTHING he doesn't have to. Which is a pity, because they almost had a really sweet moment, first with her yanking a dart out of his foot, and then getting a kick out of the idea of him ever watching Little House on the Prairie. I love those moments, where Sawyer brings up something he apparently thinks fairly run of the mill, and then Kate giggles bemusedly and suddenly he looks embarrassed. (but also secretly pleased that he made her laugh) Then, of course, she had to go and ask "What are we talking about, Sawyer?" and of course he got defensive and sour again. Good job, Kate.
The rest of Sawyer's scenes in this episode were hilarious. I love that he stormed out looking ready to kill Hurley for drinking his Scotch, and instead gets swept up in a giant bear hug. Nice to see Jin's face light up at seeing him, too. Aww, see, everybody loves Sawyer! And for all his "we gotta save our own hides" talk, there was a definite flicker of regret when he had to tell Hurley that Jack was still a prisoner. As for the rest of the ep, it's just funny to see him hang out and be one of the guys.
And then there was the sweet ending montage - Sun and Jin, Charlie and Claire, and...oh, don't even pretend that Sawyer wouldn't rather have Kate than a case of beer right now.
Lowlight Number 1: Nikki and Paulo are still the stupidest characters ever. They just look like awkward extras who are all giddy that they finally get to hang out with the stars of Lost.
Lowlight Number 2: I rather like my Charlie with some stubble. Boo on the clean-shaven face, boo! Unless, of course, this leads to Claire kissing Charlie more often, which would be fantastic.
Quote of the Night: "Yeah. Chase the dog with the skeletal arm [in his mouth] into the creepy jungle, you be my guest." --Charlie
Sawyer: What's your problem, Jumbo-Tron?
Hurley: Shut up, Red...Neck...Man!
And lastly, while I think Hurley's the biggest lutz in the world and generally can't stand him, it was still a little bit touching to hear him confessing his uncertainties and insecurities at Libby's grave. That and the quote were really his only useful moments in this whole episode.
I want you to know that it took me TWO HOURS to focus on anything after this aired, and that I almost had to SIT ON MY HANDS to keep myself from writing a post devoted entirely to capital letters and flailing as soon as it aired. I want you to appreciate how difficult it is for me to sit here and continue to save my flailing until the end of this review, because I'm kind of tempted to hyperventilate every time I think about the ending. But there may be people reading this who are not rabid D/L shippers, so I am going to exhibit some measure of self control. Maybe. For a while. I should stop lying to myself.
(as the magic shop owner brings a "dead" fly on the counter back to life)
Flack: Fake fly.
Mac: Sodium chloride. Introducing a fine, nearly invisible piece of salt onto the waterlogged fly to re-establish the salt to water equilibrium necessary to enable the fly to conduct its cellular metabolism.
Flack: I like the fake fly theory better.
Further proof of disdain
Shop Owner: Well well, if it isn't the Great Debunker. What can I do for you this time, Detective?
Flack: I'm looking for a way to make my case load disappear. You got that in your bag of tricks?
Owner: They're not tricks, they're *illusions.*
Flack: *snicker* Whatever.
AND, the best one.
Flack: You think Houdini knew the impact he would have on mafia lingo?
Hawkes: *WTF? face*
Flack: Well, it's like when they whack somebody, they say "we made him do a Houdini." You think that would make him proud?
Hawkes: Are we actually having this conversation?
Flack: Oh, I'm sorry. Can you explain the difference between DNA and RNA, is that better? Because that's scintillating conversation, right there.
HEE!! Flack is starting to remind me of when Booth gets all short-tempered and irritated with the Squints on Bones, and I find that lack of patience for scientific explanation weirdly attractive. And really, no amout of description will make up for Flack's inflection & expressions. It's one of the funniest scenes all season, and you really must see it for yourself.
As for the case itself, I kind of regret that despite seeing a million previews for it while watching CSI Miami reruns when I had access to shiny cable channels at school, I never actually watched an episode of Criss Angel: Mind Freak. Don't know why; I love magic and illusion and all that jazz, but he was just too creepy looking for me to really appreciate. But at least I know who he is. I didn't think the storyline was bad at all. True, I wasn't really paying attention to it, as I had a lot of other things to focus on, but I rather enjoyed what I saw. I did think that final scene with the mother-in-law could have been trimmed a minute or two; it was just a lot of dialogue that seemed design to milk his screen time for all it was worth. And there was bit too much preening before a screaming crowd, to the point where I started hitting the mute button. But the rest of it...yay! I could even handle Mac figuring out how to peform the illusions, far-fetched as that seemed, because we all know that Mac is the Expert of Everything. I'm still not convinced he needed to learn how to perform either of those tricks, I think he just couldn't stand there being something he didn't know how to do.
Which led to another great quote exchange...this one's hilarious because Danny doesn't even sound surprised that he encounters stuff like this anymore. He's just like, "Sigh. What's Mac up to now?"
Mac: (extending a lighter) You want to do the honors?
Danny: Are you lighting your arm on fire in the name of science?
Mac: What other job allows you to set your boss on fire? Going once...going twice...
Danny: Sold. But if you go up in flames, I get your office.
Random Thoughts: I like that that they threw in just that little snippet of a scene of Stella looking at
Okay, now it's time to let the squeeage commence for D/L.
First of all, can I just say that sleep-deprived Danny behaves more like he's drunk, and I'd rather not ever see that loopy side of him again? Good. I know the critics will RIP TO SHREDS that scene where he sees Lindsay walking towards him with a big smile, and he gets a dopey grin on his face before she turns into a random lab tech with similar hair, and he realizes he's seeing things. And I admit that was a teeny, tiny bit cheesy. But I am not going to argue with anything that gives me a window into Danny's thoughts and tells me whom he most wants to see.
I love that we see him head home, where he spends about 15 seconds in his apartment before apparently coming to an epiphany as he mumbles "Go with your instincts," and turns 'round to book a red-eye flight to Montana. More insight. Yay for insight.
I loved that Lindsay called Stella right before the trial started, because who better to turn to for advice? And I love that the sight of the murderer being in such close proximity left her paralyzed. Because it doesn't matter that it's 10+ years later, or how much she's overcome; when she looks at him she becomes that helpless high school girl again, trembling in the bathroom, hearing her friends screams.
It was nice to see her occasionally break down as she repeated the events of that night, and I loved seeing her start to falter on the stand as she neared the end of her testimony. Now, I do not think she was on the verge of completely falling apart and being unable to continue. Had Danny not shown up just then, she is strong enough that she would in short order have found a reservoir of courage and pushed on. But there is no denying that seeing him made it easier. That he would come across the country to support her, in spite of all times she's pushed him away, means a hell of a lot.
As for the handhold while waiting to hear the verdict, I giggled, because this is just like the Jack/Angela scene on Bones. While I was already using that scenario and inserting Danny & Lindsay into it, words can't express how happy I am to see it for real on this show. Complete with head on shoulder, as promised! (Dear Anti-Lindsay World: NOT ONE WORD about "wouldn't her family have been there support her?") Honest to God, I thought the episode, or at least the Lindsay part, would end right there, fade out. So imagine my muted screams of delight when it continues. He stands up, turns to give her a hug. Given how tightly she hugs him back, that was enough to tell me that now she's faced her demons and won, she no longer has a reason to run from him. AND THEN:
He lets go, turns to lead her out, but is stopped by her hand still tightly clasping his, pulling him back. I cannot properly describe the look on her face...hopeful, confident, inviting? A half grin forms on his face, he reaches for her and she leans in to kiss him. So close! A million icons will show you that they could not possibly have gotten any closer to one another, but just before their lips touch, hordes of flashbulbs go off as the press
I see no reason to break them apart any time soon, either. Having already pulled abait-and-switch on us, they (and we) have earned a period of prolonged happiness. Besides, this is a crime drama, so relationships are generally allowed a certain coasting period - as opposed to regular dramas, on which they begin eroding the second they're acknowledged.
It is now past 3 in the morning. My energy level has not waned in the slightest. Boing! *springs off walls* If my ship wasn't canon before, it's definitely canon now. *pogo-sticks up and down* Yeah, I can probably survive hiatus.