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NCIS: Nine seasons in and STILL MANAGED TO OUTDO ITS OWN PREVIOUS NUMBER 1 GIBBS/ABBY SCENE.

BRB, running around and flapping my wrists in lieu of sleeping. Until I'm ready to tackle that beautiful thing with roughly 1116 screencaps (does anyone know where I could find logo-free screencaps?), have some other things that I have cobbled together after skipping all around the past two weeks in no order at all. 

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Law & Order: SVU: 13x03, "Blood Brothers"
I had some trouble figuring out why they were dead set on prosecuting this as a sex crime early on when the girl a) repeatedly either insisted she was not raped or made allusions to a boyfriend, and b) seemed extremely pleased by the fact that she was pregnant. I realize she was 13, but I just assumed we all viewed pregnant 13-year-olds as skanky hos these days unless they say otherwise. I will never forget being told about statistics on middle schoolers having "rainbow parties" in my high school health class, and that was in 2003.

I fell asleep halfway through because it was late, I was tired, and the case was boring enough that I was happy to just catch up with a recap. But from the parts I saw, I really liked Casey & Olivia going head to head where they were both right, and I also determined that Benson/Amaro is the best pairing this show has ever had (detective pairing). Way better than her & Stabler. I have, in fact, mostly forgotten Stabler ever existed, and I'm OK with that. They play really well off each other, I think, or maybe I'm just ridiculously in love with his unflappable charm and charisma. 

Due to the boredom, I failed to recognize this as the "Arnold Schwarzenegger case" episode, but I always appreciate Kyle Maclachlan coming around for a guest starring role.

13x04, "Double Strands"
These titles seem especially spoilery lately, don't they? That would be a problem if I ever knew what was coming up on this show.

Anyway, EXCELLENT RE-EMERGENCE IN POP CULTURE, SIR! Exceeding five years of performance on Grey's Anatomy, half of T.R. Knight's role on one episode of this show is the best thing he's ever done. Largely because he makes an awesome dad, and partially because he looked extra-pitiful chained to a hospital bed and asking "How could you think I would do this?" Haunt my daydreams a little more, why don't you?

(to my credit, I was really, really hoping there was another explanation for all the evidence. My only proof was the fact that cases are never solved in in the first half hour, so kudos for Amaro for continuing to win my heart by pushing heavily for said explanation until he found it. I'm gonna go ahead and say it;: he is now my favorite person on the series. He's even better than the all the fantastic prosecutors. Rejuvenating an aging show, this is how you do it.)

Gabriel's only negative factor was the gross tattoo. Who marries someone with a neck tattoo? Any tattoo is grounds for a dealbreaker in my world (and you know how I have those suitors lined up around the block), but a neck tattoo is especially icky.

I'm going to consider Brian a necessary invention in order to let us have our cake and eat it too (awesome guest star who is not the killer), and leave it at that. Unpleasant to watch, and not just because it involved entirely too much of Rollins talking (oh hey, I finally remembered her name!). SO BORING, SO BORING, NON-EXISTENT CHEMISTRY, CUT HER LOOSE ALREADY, I AM BEGGING YOU. If she can't stand and deliver with plum material like this, how is she ever going to do anything? I like her best when she is sidelined with Fin, I think -- she bugs me less around him -- but the knowledge that they eventually want their newbies to headline the show together gnaws at me.

Oh, and it was nice to have Munch around for more than five seconds this week. More disdain of big-brother policies, snark after having to handle tipline duty (chewing glass being a much preferable break), and a nice aside with Amaro.

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How I Met Your Mother, 7x05, "Field Trip"
-I'm getting used to the ducky tie. Hard to remember Barney without it.

-The non-married romances are still nauseating me, to the point where I am miming a gag reflex and sourly looking away every time something happens on those fronts. THIS IS THE WORST. I especially want to know how Kal Penn can be considered even the tiniest bit attractive by any stretch of the imagination. I have run Mr. Therapist through every scenario I can think of that usually gets me to warm up to unfavorable male characters, none of which would be feasible on this sort of lighthearted comedy anyway, and there is not one single thing he could do to change my mind. I am therefore unqualified to comment even objectively on whether or not it is creepy to date your therapist. 

-However, even though I have only seen a small part of Return of the Jedi, it was the part with the Ewoks and I therefore feel qualified to comment on the fact that anyone who dislikes Ewoks is clearly an unfeeling and awful person. Dump her! Dump her!

-My favorite parts were Ted's field trip (especially Barney's lecture, and especially Ted's outraged reminder that "these are 18-year-olds!" Robin screeching at them to get out was also good) and Marshall's work woes. Those highly entertained me and should play well in repeats.

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CSI, 12x03, "Bittersweet"
Dear Ted Danson: The way to my heart is not lecturing Sara. Even if she is wrong. Still waiting for you to earn your name. No love, me.
p.s. weird-ass attempts to weirdly reach out to her at the end will not help. They will just make me miss when Grissom was her supervisor even more.

Case 1:
-Always beautiful when Sara gets passionately involved with sexual assault cases. I saw the ending coming a mile away, but it wasn't any less heartwrenching to watch Sara try and come to terms with it.

-O hai, Wendell, I've missed you since I ex-communicated Bones. Always happy to see you. Even when it's a homicidal version of you.

-Tiny details like the fact that Sara can recognize a Pomeranian on sight makes me happy. It's not a hard breed, but I would bet a random sample of people on the street would have trouble naming it.

In other news, my first reaction to this episode: "Oh god, she's pretty. Happen. Make that happen. Nick is SO OVERDUE for a pretty lady, and this one is obviously perfect!"
(1 minute later: Doc Robbins' niece who is but temporarily in town?? Now I don't know what to do with this. How old is she? Should I be looking at this as a, a gentlemanly escort sort of way, or can I still believe in its date potential? I don't care. I am sticking with my "Nick is long overdue for a pretty lady" convictions.)

-Beautiful Nick/Sara connection in there. She looks so defeated, and I love how he talks her through it until they're off on a new lead. I love these two.

-And then Nick hugs the rescued girl at the end. Stop it, you're killing me! There is too much going right!

Case 2:
In less showy but no less exciting news, still loving Morgan and any and all scenes of her and Greg working together. Especially if they are summoned before Ted Danson's desk like a pair of classmates discussing a school project. They've got really fun working chemistry.

And aw, Henry and his excitement over DNA. Go Henry!

In conclusion: Winner of the weekly CSI showdown, current best of the season, and strong contender for a season highlight. VERY good work.
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12x04, "Maid Man"
CSI's writing quality has definitely held steady this year, so it is to my eternal disappointment that they felt they needed to go the route they did with Russell's character. They seem to think he is lovable and endearing, and have taken several brainwashed fans down that road (see what happens when you keep an open mind? Close that stuff down and force them to change it). I merely find his rapid shifts between "nice guy" and "quirky goof" and "stern boss" confusing and irritating. I don't like the ground constantly shifting beneath my feet, not knowing who he really is.

(I do enjoy the characters expressing similar displeasure, though. When even Greg rolls his eyes at your antics, you've gone down a bad road)

Aside from that, another greatepisode. It's not often that I am 100% interested in the actual casework for both cases, and while the hotel slaying was a lot less intense, Nick shamed me into thinking all cases are primo. Although nothing can hold a candle to whatever features Greg's specialized Walking Encyclopedia Of Vegas History/Epic Fanboy mode. Also appreciated the references to Sam. And is Frances Fisher ever anything short of marvelous? No, she is not.

Oh, and the ex-mayor was a hoot. (and what's this, the internet said he was playing himself? now that's just too awesome for words. I must be reading it wrong). Fun, too, to see Mandy's approval of Morgan. And I will say this, Ted Danson seems like he's a much better boss when you're a lab tech as opposed to a CSI. So far he has been normal enough with them to give the illusion of being a fun boss. Sorry, you didn't think he'd earned his character name yet, did you?

Finally, my memory is a seive and the name "Frank Gedda" registered exactly nothing on my radar until after the ep when I hit Tumblr. You know, despite an episode title featuring his name. What is wrong with me?

Up next: holy crap, this season is on fire. Somewhat literally, according to the preview, but figuratively speaking I mean GREG, PLEASE FREAK OUT HARDER, I'M NOT SURE THE SQUEE HAS KILLED ME YET.

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