In case you were wondering where I've been since Saturday. Wrapped in various waking nightmares. I don't recommend it, yet watch me read my latest one yet again tonight, apparently just to keep the horror fresh. Who needs restful sleep?
On bright side, for the past 3 days I actually forgot 4x04 and its fallout existed. It was a bliss like no other. I may be willing to make this trade.
NON-CRIMINAL-MINDS TELEVISION. YES. GOOD.
How I Met Your Mother, 8x08, "Twelve Horny Women"
The title may not have sounded promising, but Brad is still around so it's worth watching (not least for the fantastic way Marshall ultimately wins his case. But more importantly, how he cups a tiny duckling in his hands for a while). I mean, you can't really blame the women of this jury for letting their brains melt out their ears after that excellent video montage, can you?
And then in subplot land, I guess the other four members were competing to see who was the biggest juvenile delinquent for some reason, or as I like to call it, "Contest To See Which One Of You RS Hates Most This Week." I spent half the episode trying to figure out if I missed some crucial setup in the opening minute when I turned on the TV late, because it really did not make sense that they would think lawbreaking and otherwise getting trouble was cool.
Was not expecting Marshall's story arc to turn judge-track, but I like where this is going.
2 Broke Girls And The Egg Special
Things I really loved, in no particular order: Max & Andy's continued awesome repartee, the blurb in Martha Stewart Living, Max's unholy joy at breaking crime scene tape to marvel at the real live blood spatter (I honestly found this hysterical, but then I am a crime show junkie and that is how I would react to a set featuring fake blood spatter), Sophie playing fairy godmother again (now with $20,000 checks), the egg donation clinic/Caroline being the ideal donor, Caroline demanding (and receiving, despite protest!) a handhold in said clinic, and the two different responses to "you look like you want a hug"/"I do" (Max: *stands motionless* // Caroline: *fake-exits and then runs back for reciprocated attack-cuddles*)
Oh! Also the way a gruesome (shooting?) with multiple bodies went down in the soup kitchen that Max and Caroline were actually in like six days ago and what's that, AU Tragedy Radar? You want us to go play in that sandbox for a while? Gladly!
Worst things that I haven't yet repressed: Blood shooting out of Caroline's arm (OH MY GOD EVERY WORST SQUICK THAT I HAVE ALL AT ONCE THIS IS THE WORST THING THE SHOW HAS EVER DONE TO ME EVER), the girls - and by extension, ME - horrifically embarrassing themselves, and probably a bunch of sex jokes and/or references.
Conclusion: possibly even more awesome than last week. This show is Bringin' It for sweeps.
P.S. I forgot about the Barney/Robin interaction at the end. Again. Possibly this is not a good sign for the ship.
Voice: Pretty sure that is the 59th time you have referenced not caring about them. FYI.
And here we have the midseason finale. Did it do what a good cliffhangery finale should do, i.e. leave us eagerly anticipating more but not going mad from YOU CAN'T LEAVE IT THERE!! stress? Yes, but mostly because they were kind enough to show a promo for the episode 4 months from now and kick it off with some new footage from the cliffhanger scene, just enough to take the edge off. Wise marketing choice! Aaaand...rewind.
I liked her first meeting with her mother (wary and suspicious, that's my girl), and the heartwarming reunion with Danny (FINALLY. Also, literally the only thing that makes me believe she is 20/21 as opposed to 16 is when I see her next to him, and he's certainly believable as 19 but he's also clearly the younger one).
Friendly reminder that Rachel the Badass just killed the only person who scares Miles Matheson. +2 in Stabbing with Unexpected Weapons.
I liked that Miles didn't hesitate for a second when Rachel got added to the Must Rescue list, and her slap-happy response to his face was both delightful and a backstory I am beyond eager to dig into. (not shipping not shipping not shipping damn it.)
I am also super relieved that he showed up at the end, because I was not going to cope well if one concerned conversation over Charlie's bleeding head wound was the last I got to see of them for god-knows-how-long. THAT would have been the type of cliffhanger that would have made me throw things. That way I can giggle at how she just stands there like a determined loyal dog and his immediate reaction is, of course, "Run, you idiot!" Haaaahahaha.
Raise your hand if you find Rachel a far better addition to their little pack of refugees than the blond we killed off, yeah?
The absolute hatred cemented in Neville's heart after Miles threatened his wife was fabulous, and is clearly going to inform the whole second half of the season while being the best thing ever. Marvelous hate chemistry.
And last but not least, this episode did the impossible, and made see the bond between Miles & Monroe. Stupid childhood flashbacks. I am a sucker for childhood best friends! Also in the recordbooks: my first-ever instance of not hating David Lyons' face, as he actually got to me with his wild and desperate Crazy Eyes in the present day, talking about family and being rejected, albeit rightfully so, in the most scornful and disgusted way possible. Awwww. :( If only you hadn't become such a power/torture-mad dictator.
Not totally sure I love Monroe suddenly having electrical power again, because as one review said, "the dynamic of the series is bound to change. It’s irrevocably going to go from the story of survival in a world without power, to the battle between those who can wield power in limited fashion." And that just seems boring. But I'm hopeful the characters are strong enough now to make it work.
Go On was surprisingly...good?
This is a foreign word. I completely credit Misti May-Treanor, one of the only two Olympians I have cared about in the past 15 years. She is the most delightful human being; you have no idea how much beach volleyball I watched this summer after about five minutes of seeing her & her team partner interviewing on camera.
So even though she left for good rather early on, I adored her small part. (can she PLEASE try this guest-spot thing full time? Need more) I also got endless entertainment out of the first couple of scenes featuring Ryan making a total fool of himself while his unimpressed Wing Chick hung out on the sidelines and that was enough to buoy me through to the end. (I bet your blood tastes good! Because Twilight!) Ryan continuing to make a total fool out of himself may have helped. (secondhand embarrassment: so unbearable on 2 Broke Girls, so mistifyingly awesome here).
Also, aww for "I don't want to do this, I want to be married" mentality.
Last but not least, I watched The Mindy Project for what it turns out is the first time since the pilot, and it was super-awesome!
I mean, her male coworker is still just awful, but who is this fantastic 15-year-old neighbor girl who apparently idolizes her and whom Mindy is more than happy to take under her wing? This is the most precious thing I have ever seen, I want more of it. I am clearly Mindy here, eager to dispense life wisdom, as a teen-plus (BEST TERM), to people half my age. I mean, mine would involve more head-slapping of people requesting birth control at age 15 and less sleeping with people I didn't have a significant shot at spending forever with (I will believe in this like a kid, or respectable Catholic, for life), but otherwise, basically the same.
Mine also probably wouldn't involve showing up at high school to pass out condoms, not necessarily for moral reasons but because I'm not excited to be escorted out in zip-cuffs and have to be bailed out of school jail. (showing up at high school and wandering about the halls unsupervised is totally me though) Although this entire storyline made me fall out of my chair laughing, so that's something. "If I were a white male you wouldn't be -- yeah, okay."
Also this episode renewed my lifelong desire to play with Gak. Or preferably Floam, the less-slimy version of Gak, but either way.
I am still puzzled by what sort of self-respecting 15-year-old would rather acquire birth control and have sex than shop for American Girl merchandise, though. This is just a gap in logic.
Quotable Quotes, Courtesy of Tumblr
“I’m a surgeon. I can figure out how to sit in a bean bag chair.”
"Don't overthink Slime."
"Usually I go for super skinny white girls, but something about this one screamed ‘yeah, okay.’ "
"You are so smart. I wish that we were lesbians and we could get married. But we wouldn’t have sex or anything.
"Sometimes you just need your boss to tell you that you look sexy."
(This whole conversation was awkwardly adorable though.)