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Been down one time, been down two times...

I stopped reading the detailed spoilers for Glee after 6x04 (I guess they exist up to #8 now?) because I couldn't take it anymore, and even those I skimmed after episode 2, but curiosity compelled me to read this TV Line post about the posters for the final season. I figured the article wouldn't be too spoilery, and I was right -- that's like what we knew back in July -- but then my eyes helplessly flicked over the comments and pretty much everything made me want to light the world on fire. I have just never seen a show where every single piece of information I learn somehow trips my rage trigger. Is it worse than Bones now? Yes. Yes, it is.


From what I have newly gleaned, on the positive side, Tina is in at least 4 episodes so far and supposedly has a duet with Quinn?? Nooooo you can't suck me in with that. (also, I find it not-insignificant that my secondary reaction to hearing about them being there was to have my heart seize up in fear and wonder what terrible character assassination will be visited upon them next. Especially Tina, who has yet to suffer anything permanently damaging.)

I repel you with the sucky news:

-Apparently Bieste is transgender now, or at least exploring a trans identify. JFC. I know I have not been her greatest fan, and but can we not pull the punk-ass "butch women are basically dudes" card? Even ontd-glee finds that offensive. I find it so offensive that I made a concentrated effort to spell her name right for a little dignity.

-"Sue made the younger members of ND transfer schools so they wouldn't try to restart Glee club." (paraphrased) So joke's on you, everyone who liked their eventual friendship bonding! That is super heartbreaking to think of Marley cast out to the winds, once again without the friends she struggled so hard to make. Most of the reason I have tried to resist knowledge of what happened in episode 100 has been my despair about what this meant for the non-graduated members, and this was just like a sledgehammer to the chest bone. Worse than I ever imagined.

-More to the point, this means I STILL don't get Marley/Ryder, and I gotta tell you, those actors dating each other IRL is a very poor consolation prize when NO ONE IS WILLING TO GET OFF THEIR ASS AND DOCUMENT IT. Seriously, they have been together for well over a year and yet I have more pictures of my former crushes and their wives on Facebook than I do of these two technically-celebrity cutie pies. Tumblr, do something useful with your lives and track them already! I am personally offended that I can know what Darren Criss or Chris Colfer was doing on pretty much any given day of the last 5 years, but Melissa and Blake can disappear from sight for months on end.

-Oh, but of course Unique manages to find a way back for at least 1 ep. (see "trans identity") Ugh. Possibly Kitty too, from the sounds of it. The least likely candidate to return? The only one I fully love, Ryder.

-Just when you think you've drummed Brittana out of town for good, it's back. Annoying me on a personal level and on a principle one, because if I didn't like them in season 3, you can imagine how much less I like them after being put through the wringer of a pointless breakup and dating other people.

-Obviously, this is all to say nothing of how generally miserable the Klaine storyline is. Like I can't even articulate it or hear a brief allusion to it because I will end up retching. Technically I'm vague on the current details, but I definitely haven't heard any reassuring noise, so... I will take Tonks and Lupin dying a thousand times over this.

In fairness, there is one thing I genuinely liked reading -- something about Sam and Rachel kissing? WHERE, SIGN ME UP -- and in any other context I would love seeing all my faves be teachers/directors of various Ohio show choirs for a season (say IDK like after college graduation), but it's just going to be too hard to extricate those nuggets from the background of fire and brimstone.

There was a brief time when fandom managed to convince me that the worst of the spoilers were actually foilers, because obviously they were so ludicrous they could never be true! I managed to believe this even though those same people also deluded themselves into being sure that Kurt & Blaine wouldn't break up in 4x04. That time is pretty well gone, though. It would have to be the longest con in television at this point.

My only consolation at this point is that at least there will be less than four months of hell, counting previews in December, to have to avoid tuning the TV to FOX. No breaks, an early January start and only an 11-week run. I would like to thank God and also Jesus.

The time is coming when I will have to unfollow the last of my Glee people on Tumblr -- I still have a solid core of the militantly unspoiled, but that's gone once the new season starts airing, because I will not risk exposure to season 6 -- and that is going to be a very sad day indeed, because there will be no safe place left to reminisce that ignores the canon I need to ignore to survive. Glee is my fandom mother country, but once season 666 airs, the land will be poisoned forever. *strums guitar* Never goin' back again...

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